Lazy sunday

Cheating, General 1 Comment »

It was an ok day, except that I gave in to my chocolate cravings (yesterday and today). I managed to buy no-sugar-added low-carb chocolate, so hopefully it didn’t do too much damage. I just need to learn to have smaller portions. I get so excited to be able to have chocolate I overdo it. Actually, I’ve realized that it may be better if I didn’t have any chocolate at all. Maybe there will come a time in my life when I have enough will-power, or even better a complete indifference, to chocolate. Have stayed away from ice-creams completely (except for the small bowl last Sunday as ice creams are my absolutely biggest weakness). I was thinking, I used to go through half kg tubs with my husband and he never said anything. At that point I used to think that he loves me so much. Now I sometimes think that maybe he didn’t care enough. He could have seen that it was doing me a lot of damage. Anyways what is done is done. No more ice-creams for me. And hopefully, in time, I’ll be able to stay away from chocolates as well.

Wish me luck girls. Tomorrow I plan to start walking. I pray that I’m able to continue it.

I shall. I am strong if I want to be.

Tomorrow’s my weigh-in day. I am nervous. I hope I haven’t put on any weight.


My reasons… continued…

Reason no. 6: To overcome the self-doubts I have about myself

Week-end chocolate

General 1 Comment »

Yesterday was a decent day food wise. Didn’t cheat and surprisingly didn’t even feel the urge. It is surprising as I have been going through a personal crisis. My marriage is going through a really bad patch, and I have been living with my parents for the last month or so. Typically in the past I would have binged like crazy at such a time. This time, I have managed to hold strong.

The day before yesterday I met up with an old friend and the floodgates opened. No, not tears, but all my pent up emotions. And I ended up drinking 4 glasses of wine (double of what is permitted in SBD) but I didn’t eat much so I hope that balanced out.

My ice-cream cravings, which were a physical addiction in the past, are practically gone. I had a small bowl last Sunday but have not felt tempted to have any more since then. Though I do feel like having some chocolate. But I’m not too sure if I should buy any. Last weekend I went through three 100g bars of chocolates. I just can’t control myself. Maybe I can buy a smaller pack. Let’s see. I’d rather buy a pack of the sugar-free chocolates and keep it with me than later binge on fattening chocolate available in regular stores (sugar-free/diet chocolates are not easily available where I live)

Have a good week-end everyone!

Today’s reason:

Reason no 5.: So I can give in guilt-free to my chocolate urges once in a while



A good day

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In a hurry today, so I’m not going to write a long post. It has been a good day. Food wise, I’ve not cheated. Not even when I went for a Client meeting. And, I got my periods. But for the first time, after a long long time, I am not feeling as bloated as I usually do. Not started exercising yet. This Monday I shall start walking. Going to put down exercise goals for myself. This time, I’ll take everyone’s advice and start slow with the exercising.

Today’s reason for wanting to lose weight:

Reason No. 4: To feel good about myself during PMS and menses.

To prove them wrong

Uncategorized 1 Comment »

Though I’d told myself that I would check my weight only once a week, the one-notch tighter belt tempted me to check my weight. I have not lost any more since my last weight-in. Not a bit! It is kind of disappointing. But then, it was silly of me to expect sudden miracles. On the other hand, I am PMSing right now and I do typically bloat up during this period. So maybe, just maybe, I have lost something and it’s not showing because of the water-retention. I guess that’s just wishful thinking. Oh well! Anything to get me going.

On a positive note, I met a friend after 3 weeks and she said that I was looking visibly slimmer. Yay! I sure hope it continues. My friend’s not so nice husband is always cynical every time I mention that I am going on a diet (and yeah, that’s happened many times and never led to sustaining weight-loss). But her husband can really be irritating, especially when he gives the knowing smirk. Well this time, I shall show him!

Today’s reason:

Reason no. 3: To prove my friend’s husband wrong

Belt a notch tighter

General 1 Comment »

Today my belt is tighter by one notch. I haven’t weighed myself since Monday so I don’t know if I have lost any further weight, but it doesn’t seem so. Maybe I was just wearing it looser earlier. But whatever! It is encouraging and how. I know its a long journey ahead but everyday counts and everyday, bit by bit, shall make that one day when I shall reach my goal. Yippee!

Today’s reason…

Reason no 2: So I can buy a nice belt for my jeans in the ladies section, instead of having to look at the (fat) men’s section.

Papa please preach

Compliments 3 Comments »

Today was a special day. In all these years my father has been my worst critic. He has nagged me about my weight so many times, to the extent of saying hurtful things like I have become so obese that I look ugly. I know he’s had my best intentions at heart. But it hurt all the same. Today, he said that I was already looking so much nicer and that I should keep it up. This is more encouraging than anything anyone else can say. And I do feel good. And though I am still 50 pounds away from my ideal weight, I know all the hard work will be worth it.

On a sorry note, I had three biscuits today, one of which was a pineapple cream. I didn’t even enjoy it. I was at a long boring meeting today morning and the plate of biscuits kept tantalizing me till I gave in. I hope I can control better in future, especially after my father’s compliments today morning.

I am still not exercising. My work pressure is so much; I can barely manage to survive through the day. Just the thought of exercising tires me even more. Perhaps, if I exercise I’ll feel more energetic. At least, I need to start. Soon.

I was going though sterling’s blog ( today and got really inspired.

Now, every post I too shall give one reason for wanting to lose weight.

Reason no. 1: I want to make my parents feel proud of me

Week-4 weigh in

Weigh in 1 Comment »

Today was my official week-4 weigh in. Weight was around 183.5 and 184. Doesn’t sound too exciting especially as I had aimed to touch 180 by Sept 1 (which would be the week-5 weigh in). I guess all that binging didn’t help at all. The good thing is that it’s stopped today and I’m back on track.


My food intake:

Breakfast: 1 egg omelet + 1 cup black decaf coffee

Mid-morning: 2 coffees (no sugar) + 5 almonds

Lunch: 1 serving tuna + 1/2 cucumber sliced + 1 diet coke


Does diet coke weight loss? Or can I have this one indulgence? Somebody please advice.


Not started exercising yet. 🙁                                                                                                     


Back with a bang

Cheating 1 Comment »

I have not managed to post for the past four days. The first two days, I was busy with a shoot. Yesterday was spent taking my dog to the vet and then meetings at work. Today being a Sunday, I’ve just been pure lazy.

GUILTY: I have cheated majorly on my diet. I have gone through three 100g chocolate bars and one packet of sugar-free sweets. Though the chocolate as well as the sweets were low-fat, so much of it couldn’t have been good. Also, the two days of the shoot I had outside food and also gave in to the temptation of cheese sandwich both days. Today I also had a small bowl of vanilla ice-cream. Cheat cheat cheat! I weighed myself in the morning. Am at 183.5 pounds and almost 4 pounds away from the target I had planned for this month end. God only knows how my cheating will affect my weight.

Anyways, no point in crying over what’s been done. I must now resolve harder to loose weight. I need to start exercising. Otherwise I don’t think I will see any more reduction in weight. And it would be great to be in the 170s by my birthday in October.

Here’s to going back to track with a bang, starting now.

Good (weight-loss) day all!

Heavy bones or is that an excuse?

Exercise No Comments »

I am so excited about this blog. In the past, like I wrote before, I’ve done many attempts to lose weight. I have always been unsuccessful. This time I feel confident that I will manage to accomplish my goals. And this blog will be my companion through the journey.
I have to constantly try to control my urge to weigh myself everyday. I know i won’t see any loss and the fluctuations may end up demotivating me.
The trouble is that all my life I’ve been heavy. In fact, even at my slimmest (and now that I look at the pictures I see that I was quite thin) I was much heavier than my ideal weight. Maybe I have heavy bones, but it doesn’t help my frame of mind to see my weight as 150 pounds even when I’m thin. The other problem is that I seem to have a very slow metabolism. My weight tends to stall after the first 5 pounds. At least with SBD I’ve managed to lose 10 pounds. I need to desperately start exercising. But I just don’t seem to be able to motivate myself. Maybe if I keep telling myself that I can do it, I will. They say, positive thinking is all it takes.

Defining goals

Weigh in 1 Comment »

I have been overweight for what seems like forever. I can’t remember the last time I was ok with my weight. Must be 10 years at least. I have been wanting to do something. I’ve tried many diets. Joined gyms (and paid a lot of money). But I have never been able to sustain anything. I have absolutely no will power. And in defiance I have binged even more. I have told myself that I am beautiful and I don’t need to be thin to be liked. I pushed myself to have a healthy body image. But the thing is that I didn’t. I actually just said to everyone that I am happy the way I am, but in my heart I wasn’t.

I touched an all time high of almost 200 pounds a year back. That shook me up. I was 29 and 200 pounds. I had high cholesterol and being a smoker in a high stress job that’s a sure welcome sign to cardiac problems, etc. I went on the south beach diet for a month or two last November and lost around 10 pounds. But as always I could not sustain it. Slowly but surely the pounds have crept back in the last six months.  

I have now started SBD again, on July 28th. I am down to 185 pounds. I feel great and encouraged. This time I am going to lose the weight, I am sure.

 My eventual goal: 140 pounds

My goal for my brother’s wedding in Feb: 154 pounds

My plan to get down to 154 pounds :

Sept 1, 2008: 180

Oct 1, 2008: 176

Nov 1, 2008: 169

Dec 1, 2008: 165

Jan 1, 2009: 161

Feb 1,2009: 154

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