Sometimes, weight gain is so slow it’s almost invisible. It feels like one moment you’re on your best behavior and things are going well and somehow — seemingly overnight — you’re back in your fat pants and you don’t know exactly when it happened.
I knew I was gaining weight but I didn’t know that I had gained so much until a month ago I went into my closet and it seemed like ALL of pants didn’t fit. I had to dig deep and break out the big guns: THE FAT PANTS. I roll my eyes, disgusted with myself and reach into the back of the closet for my Fat Pants. I go to put them on and THEY DIDN’T FIT. Needless to say, that moment really restarted this weight loss journey for me.
Fast forward a month and I’ve been on Ideal Protein for one week. I put on a new pair of pants this morning and they were baggy. I smiled to myself and I thought that if these pants won’t fit then the FAT PANTS will definitely be too small.
My pants sat in the back of the closet today but they were definitely at the forefront of my mind. They aren’t really pants at all. They’re an insurance policy. I kept them just in case I needed them. I always had them to fall back on when I gained weight again. They were always there for me.
Wait! Have I spent the past decade self sabotaging my efforts? If I lose weight but keep my fat pants am I almost guaranteeing that I will gain weight back? Looking through my closet I have items in various sizes. I keep the smaller stuff in case I ever get back into it and I keep the larger stuff in case I need it again. I’ve set myself up for continuing this madness for a lifetime.
I walked to my closet and took out the pants in question. One of the belt loops is broken and you can tell they’ve seen better days. I looked at them and thought of key moments where they have served me well in my life. I went on a date with my husband – then boyfriend – in those pants. I’ve hosted many dinner parties in those pants. I went to my daughter’s high school graduation in those pants. All that emotion tied to a pair of pants. They were more than just pants. They were a lifesaver after a great Thanksgiving meal, they were safe place to run to when I needed comfort, and it’s the pair that I knew I would always have just in case.
After I waxed nostalgic for a while I took that size 28 insurance policy and thew them in the trash. I’m NOT on a diet. I’m changing my life with a structured meal plan and with that I don’t need insurance pants.
Posted on October 21st, 2012 by futurehealthywoman
Filed under: Weight Loss