Okay, so I had the equivalent of 2-3 glasses of Riesling tonight, and I am not really happy about that BUT….I know there are going to be fuck ups. And though its no excuse, one of my best friends was having a major panic/anxiety attack over a misunderstanding and that drove me to stress out. I need new ways on the go to deal with this sort of thing. I do believe I clocked in at about 1300 calories total, though. I know if anything though I did it wrong I shouldnt have gone over my calorie quota. I’m going to log it all in Sparkpeople and put 4 glasses just to be safe since we drank it out of mugs. Or I did, rather. One full mug and one fraction of a mug with lots of water.
To combat and remember what I am doing here I am going to work out in an hour. Not like it will do me much good since my body will more than likely process those useless alchohol carbs instead of what -needs- to be burned, but I feel like I have to. Plus, I know where my resistance band is! Wooooo.
So, think of it as atoning for my sins, I suppose. And this reminds me that I have tuna steaks in my bag that need refridgerating.
By the way, all my protein today came from tuna. Wowzers. Oh…and sugar free pudding.
With my calculations in Sparkpeople finished I came in at exactly 1,262 calories. Not bad for content, though quality was not so hot. I also smoked a lot today. I must find a way to translate my stress to something more useful or not detrimental like drawing, sculpting, knitting….Tetris. Just something. I did do a great job of turning down Eddie’s offering of lamb, onion and gravy though. I did not eat more than two tiny nugs of the chocolate covered Macadamia nuts he had. This may not seem big as I say, but normally I have a habit of being a trash compactor for anything a friend doesnt finish and offers me. Which in a way is insulting, though he was just cooking enough for two and offering the other half. For cases like Kristina and others, though…it feels good to refuse what I think of as their offal.
They don’t realize they are being insulting or enabling and I know that, but I realize I feel much better not being the one always around to finish off someone’s refuge when they have had as much as needed to feel content. Thats a message I want to send to people with high metabolic rates and naturally thin ectomorphic or mesopmorphic body types: Your less fortunate, poor, fat, chubby or binge eating and emotional eating friends are not garbage disposals. Even if they act like one. Keep your unwanted gobbets to yourself in the future. Wrap your leftovers up, take them home and thats a meal for you in a few hours, right?
Trust me, Thinnies and do not be insulted. But its the right thing to do.
EDIT: Did the 2mile Walk away the pounds with roomates (Except for Tom, the usual suspect) Ah, it was great! I feel wunderbaaar….even if it wont really count. But thats okay!
…all night long.