A.M. weigh-in: 162.2
Why can’t I get my act together??? I just can not seem to get my head back in the game. I feel totally out of it. I am not willing to give up, not officially. But my actions seem to indicate that I already have… about two months ago. I’m up almost 20 pounds. TWENTY POUNDS!! My GOD, that is a lot. I would be dancing if I had lost that much. Now I’m right back where I was last summer. <totally banging head in massive frustration>
I don’t even know where to start to get back into it. I had THREE blueberry muffins yesterday. A footlong meatball sub. We had baked potatoes, pot roast and braised carrots for dinner. And I made a cherry crisp for dessert - and had two good sized helpings. UGH. I have no answer for that. None.
Today I’ve had a small banana so far. I’m literally scared to eat anything else. It seems to be a gateway to sugar and carbs. I want to cry. I feel so lost. I have no idea how to get back on track. <me floundering>
UPDATE 5:16 PM
Thanks everyone for your encouraging comments. It helps to know I’m not in this alone.
I had a good day (so far). And I told my snack cravings where to stick it… the miracle is that THEY LISTENED! The urge to eat/snack all day has passed. In fact, I didn’t even have my planned snack of carrots and ranch dressing. I’ve stayed on plan all day. I still have tonite to deal with. But I’m feeling positive, which is a step in the right direction.
Oh, and I feel like I really care again. Like maybe, just maybe I’m ready to re-enter “the zone”. I’m afraid to get my hopes to high up. But honestly, if I don’t get this under control NOW, I’m not going to have any clothes left that fit. I gave all my larger sizes away. And I’ll be damned if I’m going to go buy new fat pants!
Posted on June 8th, 2009 by firefly
Filed under: daily blathering
So, when I look at your photos, I’m totally inspired. We are all our own worst critics sometimes! Just keep taking things day by day. Put yesterday behind you and focus on having a good day today. You are truly an inspiration.
Sweetie, stop beating yourself up, and try just taking a step back, and asking yourself what has been going in the past two months. What’s the reason for the fast gain? Extra special stress going on? Rebelling against yourself? Not thinking you deserve to be/look so great? I don’t know the answers; I’m just throwing stuff out there to help you figure out why you are backsliding. That said, if sugar and carbs are an issue-you might want to consider South Beach. Going through Phase One REALLY, DEFINTELY helps one lose all cravings for carbs. It works. And it’s healthy. YOU CAN DO THIS. Don’t give up on yourself; you’ve come too far. Best of luck!
:: hugs ))
Maybe take a look at who you are. You have jumped out of an airplane for goodness sakes! You are capable of ANYTHING! I packed back some of my weight and I know what it feels like to sort of sit and watch yourself messing up and not feel like you can do anything about it. Sometimes it is just a timing thing, though. You will find your motivation again. I think it varies for everyone and what motivated you then may not do the trick this time. Right now most of my motivation comes from this crazy muscle obsession I have. I want about ten pounds off so that I can see better muscle definition because I am working TOO STINKING HARD lifting weights to cover my progress with a layer of fat. You are awesome and you will be back on track soon!
Hey, thanks for the video. Package arrived Friday and I’m going to give it a try probably next week. I’m on light duty this week for race recovery : )