It’s raining again. We have a few dry days and now the rain is back. And the forecast for the next week is the same - grey, bleak and dreary. Not a good way for me to start this fitness campaign, I can tell ya.
Breakfast: Yoplait light fat-free yogurt, string cheese
Lunch: footlong meatball sub from Subway - WTF???!!! that’s embarrassing… but SO delish!
Dinner: TBD
Exercise: self-flagellation - at least 2 hours worth
Yesterday I did great… until about 4 pm, after which I consumed:
3 Snickers
1 sleeve Keebler Club Crackers
1 medium bag of peanut MnMs
THREE SNICKERS??? Really? THREE? Have I lost my mind? I think we all know the answer to that one! I feel SO off lately. Like I just want to lay around and eat junk food and not care about anything or anyone. I need psychiatric care - probably a whole team. I feel like I’m spinning out of control and am totally unmotivated to do anything to stop it. Why? What do I gain by this? What’s the pay off? I can’t fathom it. I’m back at self-sabotage and I don’t know why. Why do I do this to myself? I’m so close to being back at my healthy weight. Weight I haven’t seen since the mid-90s. So why? I have big plans for this summer. BIG ONES. And I need my weight to be down for the confidence and self-esteem to be in place. Otherwise, I’ll hide behind my ass and use it as an excuse not to do things, like I always do.
And the self-flagellation continues…
Posted on March 1st, 2009 by firefly
Filed under: daily blathering
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