I am feeling February 23, 2009
very large but no so in charge. I have some serious control issues at work. To sum it up, I often dont think that anyone can do things right, or ask the right questions, so I do everything myself. The stress of “not letting go” resulted in 2 MAJOR headaches last week. The second of which landed me in the ER because it came on like now, and dropped me and made me ball like a sissy and press for hours on the right side of my head (cuz I was sure my skull was gonna blow out and my brains were going to leak out. So a shot of demerol (sleepy time happy land medicine) and a CT scan proved only that I have no brain and I am dramatic -this is Boblian’s version of course). The Doc on the otherhand thinks I’m stressed. He ordered that I eat foot high filling oreo cookies for the next 3 weeks straight…. Hey… wait… that’s KT’s plan. (I just drooled right now). Okay, so my RX was rest and don’t try to do it all. The oreo cookie sound much more doable.
So - pay attention ladies - it is time. Time to get off my stressed out ass and buckle down. Today I ate totally on plan. I did 30 minutes before work, and 30 minutes after on the tread mill. I weighed in on Thursday at 203…. injury gain (boo hoo)… quit smoking gain (blah blah blah)…. winter blues weight (blubber blah booooo hiss). What ever you call it, it needs to go away. I have to be in a bikini on May 8th, on a boat, at the river. My legs look like giant white cellulous fields. My gut sticks out as far as my butt, sometimes I think I’m walking backwards. My face. My poor fat face…… who ate me? How fast do I have to run to lose me? How hard to I have to watch my fork to make the food have less calories? I am willing to find out the answers to these questions…. if anyone else is feeling the same, drop the excuses… drop kick the excuses no matter how many times you have to. This is the week to start again. Today…. right now… start with a good nights sleep. I dare you!
