Gawd, I am in SUCH a slump, here. Post-holiday, one supposes. Aurrgh. I feel like I could sleep for a couple of day’s straight. Oh, in part, it’s the weather. I can’t remember a winter being quite so persistent with the snow and ice and sleet and so on and so forth. Seems to me that in past years, we’d at least get a little break in between bad weather incidents, but now they just keep coming, hard and fast, with very little let-up. My very BONES are aching, and my eyes, I swear, just want to close at the least convenient times (like while I’m driving down the highway). Yesterday was an abominable eating day, too. All good, nutritious foods, mind you, but WAY too much of it. I felt like a bottomless pit, y’know? Today’s a little better, not quite so ravenous, but I am looking forward to my meat loaf sandwich on pita bread at lunchtime. I made the meatloaf last night with 2 pounds of ground turkey, lots of chopped green & red pepper, onion, celery, and grated carrot. I used a couple of eggs, and grated (in the blender) Fiber One cereal instead of regular bread crumbs. Oh, and ¾ cup of ketchup, too, a palmful of cumin, some garlic, some parsley flakes, and some fresh ground black pepper. It was really, really excellent, and I just LOVE cold meatloaf sandwiches – especially when they’ve got all those veggies and extra fiber, as well. I sure do sound healthy, eh? Too bad I feel like an old, tired and worn out crone. I’m still walking with that blabbermouth Leslie Sansone for a mile every morning, but I’ve got to say that girl is getting on my last nerve. No, I won’t stop walking, but I’m seriously considering putting her on “mute” – and I would, too, if the music wasn’t so helpful in getting my old bones to jangle around a little bit. DH walks with me except on the mornings he has to put the trash out. He’s a recycling maniac – folds every box, stacks things just so in the recycling bin, packs rinsed out (catfood) cans inside other cans, etc. It takes him an hour or so on trash day mornings. Of course, he’s retired. Makes a lot of difference. Me? Well, I’m 100% with the CONCEPT of recycling, but I just don’t have the time, patience, or energy to take it to the extremes that he does. I bring my own, re-usable bags to the grocery store – I give myself a few stars for that, at least.

Our Ruby brought up the subject – in brief – of relationships that end with one of the parties in question dying before either has the inclination to resolve a disagreement or estrangement. I’m no stranger to that sort of thing, as my mother and I hadn’t spoken for two years when she died. I carried that around with me for a very long time until it occurred to me that she was on to growing spiritually (hopefully) while I was stuck with the guilt and remorse and all that good stuff associated with our failed relationship. I then had to conclude that neither of us had reached out when we could have, and possibly should have – and that the guilt wasn’t mine alone to contend with. I have recently started listening to some CD’s that I asked DH to get me for Christmas based on some philosophical writings that I was quite taken with back in the seventies when I was a rebellious flower child. Now, from the perspective of having matured ( a little ) over the past thirty-something years, I am finding them just as helpful and useful and common-sensical with regard to attitudes and approaches to daily living as I did back then. I didn’t incorporate it into my own life too well back then owing to the pressures of marriage (to what turned out to be a narcissistic nut-case), children, job and home, but now I seem to have the time and inclination to do so. And, considering my low energy levels, I’m thinking I need to do a little energy work with myself, too. No, no, the old gal hasn’t gone ‘round the bend. Not yet, anyway. This is the time in my (or anybody’s) life when I think we have the luxury of looking at and assessing our values and beliefs and ridding ourselves of those that don’t serve us well.

Now, if I can only rid myself of this ginormous appetite of mine! Seems to go in cycles – has anyone else noticed that? Oh – well, of course most of you are still having menstrual cycles, so that accounts for your fluctuations, most likely. Maybe mine is a holdover?

This upcoming weekend is 100% obligation-free. I can barely contain my delight. I plan to sleep late, and do only what I feel like doing, which won’t be much, I assure you. Maybe an eensie little bit of post-Christmas sale shopping? Hmmmm….

Okay. I’m off.

Sayonara, and be as healthy, happy and wise as you like,

Hugs,

Z