I have this pattern of obsessing on things.  I’ll get interested in something and then I’ll TOTALLY become addicted to whatever it is, and then I’ll take it to whatever limit feels like I’m “done,” and then I’ll drop it like a hot rock and move on to something else.

My obsessions don’t usually last a whole year.  For example, when I found an online Gin Rummy game, I played it.  I enjoyed playing with other real people over the net, and so I played it a lot.  Soon I was playing it every night, working on increasing my score so that I could play in advanced rooms.  Then I started playing tournaments, and oh man I came so close to winning a few times - and then, finally — I won.  As soon as I won that tournament, I lost interest in competing at online Gin Rummy.  I would say, altogether, that obsession lasted about seven months.

The longest obsession that comes to mind is last year’s obsession with quitting smoking.  It was necessary to be a little “obsessed” about it because it was such a difficult addiction to overcome.  I joined an online support group where I read daily and posted often, I made neat graphics with inspirational “quit” messages on them.  I researched every aspect of physical, mental, and emotional withdrawal from nicotine.  I lived and breathed “not smoking” for twelve whole months.

I need this obsession to last at least as long.

And yes, oh yes, it is an obsession.  The aerobic tapes, the shopping lists, the online support group, the blog, the calorie intake/burn spreadsheet, the exercise bike — it all adds up to classic-eileen-obsessionism, without a doubt.  I am fully committed and pumped and I’m in this to win — nothing less.  I need, need, need to be obsessed.

Have I mentioned that I have three teenagers, two of whom were diagnosed in their early teens with obsessive-compulsive disorder?  LOL, apple… meet tree.

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