what i think about pie December 19, 2010
I went to a French bakery for breakfast, and that is where I bought a slice of pie. It looked all tempting, and I stood there staring at it, and thinking, “I don’t even like pie that much, but if I did I bet that would be good slice of pie.” So I bought this piece of pie hoping to be converted into one of those people who are really into pie. I suspect that people who are into pie are happy a lot. I’m already happy a lot, so if I liked pie I’d probably be even more content with life. I ate the pie for lunch, and it was ok and all, but I didn’t experience any ah-ha moments or anything. That’s kind of what I wanted to happen. So much for me and pie.
I don’t know why I am opening this blog with a story about pie. Honestly, I can’t even figure out what possessed me to start a blog on this particular site. I don’t write down daily calories or track much of anything, and I have no desire to. I’ve gone that route before and it is INSANE. Telling people with eating disorders to log everything they eat is like sending a sex junky to a porn store. FOCUS on it EVEN MORE than you already do. FOCUS and CONTROL the issue. Screw that noise.
So instead I babble about whatever pops into my head first. Today it was pie.
Here is what I am thinking about today that is not related to pie: My weight has been going down bit by bit. I’m still not as fit as I once was, but even carrying around extra weight I still happen to think I’m far more attractive than tons of women that I see every day. Perhaps that makes me a vain asshole, or perhaps that means my self esteem has gone up. I have no idea. I’m pretty sure it is a mix of both things.
I stayed at my cousin’s last night (we watched Dead Alive) and stopped in shock in front of her bathroom mirror because I noticed how pretty I was. Isn’t that some silly stuff? My brain has been programmed to absorb and grudgingly accept all this cliche bullshit about what beauty is, but every so often I notice something looks pretty just because it actually looks pretty. Ahhhhhh. The small successes in life.
I also post a blog on blogger, and am wondering if I should just stick to that one and abandon this little guy. Any thoughts? I am beginning to dislike the idea of blogging on a weight loss site. I kind of hope I can talk my favorite bloggers into moving to blogger with me… some days I feel limited on this site, like I have to stick to topics that relate to my body and what I’m eating…