One woman…

…on a mission to get healthy!

Going steady January 8, 2014

Filed under: Exercise, Food — dawnyalh @ 2:37 pm

Yeah, yeah I’m only 3 days in but I’m doing better than I have in times past and that says something. I’m logging my calories, getting in my exercise, trying new foods. Speaking of new foods…OMG Just had some Dannon Light & Fit Greek Raspberry Chocolate yogurt for 80 calories. Yum, yum, yum. Works perfect for when I’ll be craving something sweet.

I haven’t let setbacks that I now call life, hamper my motivation and determination. Yesterday I logged into WOWY to start my workout. I went to the living room to press play and the DVD remote is MIA. I was not a happy camper. I got in a decent workout trying to find the darned thing. I had to wait for the kids to come home and one of them knew right where it was. Last night’s workout I’m sure was a total guilt workout since I’d technically said I performed it that morning. It was worth it even if I did stay up a bit later than I wanted.

Today’s adversity? We have no running water at the moment. I passed a huge gushing water line break this morning taking the kids to school. Luckily I filled up the water pitchers before we lost water a couple of hours ago. So I might stink by tonight but that’s okay. I can always drive out to Mom’s and borrow her shower if need be.

I’ve been to the grocery store and stocked up on snacks and more food to cook. Now to sit down and make a menu for the next week to help keep me on track.

 

I had a dream February 16, 2013

Filed under: Exercise, Food, Goals, Weight Loss — dawnyalh @ 9:05 am

To say this dream was an eye opener would be an understatement. I’ve had weird dreams but this one wouldn’t rank as high on the weirdo-meter than most.
The gist (it started out in movie format but had a moment in the middle with me being an active participant):

It was a Biggest Loser meets Fear Factor type TV show but I had more of a behind-the-scenes look. This one had one guy who was maybe 20 pounds overweight on out who believed the whole show was pretty much fake. The majority of the dream was following the day-to-day activities on the ranch.
Then the final challenge/weigh in. The contestants (who were in pairs this time) would step to the side & give a brief diary spiel then get harnessed in to be weighed. They then had to jump up to a platform that was raised, weighed & then zip lined into a water park type slide, them had to sprint to the end. While sprinting their loss came up on a jumbotron & they did another off the cuff interview. It was down to 20-pounds guy, his partner & a set of twins for who would be the lowest amount lost. Guy gets on the scale & says I expect for us top be the lowest since I don’t believe this works. Oh a Jeff Probst/Bob Harper hybrid was the host. He climbs up to the scale mechanism, gives his which team will be on the bottom speech & leaps them off to commercial. Last guy to weigh in goes to climb onto the scale but production crews start raising the platform. Rather than just lowering it back down, they make him attempt to swing himself up. He knocked over the scale, kicked the cameraman off the perch, but made it onto the platform. Then it cuts to one of the guys doing a victory lap interview making all kinds of funny arm poses, faces & body gestures. Then it showed his family in the stands commenting how he’s a new man & the show had helped him to find his confidence, blah blah. Cut to the host who says sometimes scenes may be weeks old or live & that it was part of the new format. Next shot is of an old woman (picture the lady from the Titanic movie at the end with her hair all down & flowing) doing her victory lap saying she’s just happy to get to go on the ride.
Then it cuts to a shot of me doing the final jog. I can’t remember all of what I said but in my tearful speech I was saying how the kids always tried to encourage me to lose weight & I couldn’t even do it for them. (That’s when I started crying.) I continued with I always just assumed fear is what held me back from losing weight when all along it was pure & simple laziness.

It was so real. My dream switched to me starting to do daily video diaries of my journey. I woke up feeling one of those light bulb moments. I KNOW I can do this. I have all the tools necessary but I’m too damn lazy to want to put forth the effort.
The question is do I truly WANT to change? I want to be able to run a marathon & not have to shop in the plus size section. I want lots of things I know my weight is holding me back. But do I want it enough to put forth the effort to make it happen? Right now? I don’t know. Besides fear & laziness I have hate. I HATE the hand I was dealt & that I have to work so hard @ it. In my mind I know everyone works hard at being fit; not just those of us who need to lose weight but I’m stuck in the “why me” loop.
I don’t mind that I need to log my foods & plan out exercise. I HATE having to come up with menus (and normally I love to plan). We’ve eaten unhealthy for so long that our usual go to items aren’t healthy. I would love to have someone plan the meals for me without having to pay an arm & a leg.
I have just over one week where I have a lot of time to get in exercise Biggest Loser style before I start my new job & life takes on a new twist. The question is will I?
I at least know what I need to do now. It’s time to set out my short-term & long-term goals with my plan to achieve them & to figure out how to lose the laziness.

 

New year, same me…for now! January 30, 2013

Filed under: Exercise, Food, Goals, Weight Loss — dawnyalh @ 10:57 pm

Well it’s been about six months since I last visited (wrote in) my blog. Time has passed. My life’s been lived and yet I’m still facing the same demons—learning how to eat healthy and get regular exercise. I know the ins and outs. It’s the mental battle I’m waging this time.
We are a month into the new year and I’m happy to report I’ve been eating healthy and exercising regularly for the most part. I tipped the scales on Jan. 1 at 336 pounds (just 8 pound shy of my all-time high). I had my brief pity party and looked back on the woulda, coulda, shoulda’s; put on my big girl panties and got to work.
It hasn’t been coming off as quickly as I would have liked (or what I’ve seen in times past) and I’m okay with that. I’m getting healthy and that’s the most important aspect of this journey.
I stepped on my Wii fit this afternoon to exercise and was disappointed that I still weighed the same from Monday—despite working out 2x a day thus far this week (3x today) and staying well within my calories. Then it hit me. I’m taking not one, but two medications that cause weight gain. Not only have I lost a couple inches each in my chest and waist, I’m down 12 pounds in a month. That’s an average of 3 pounds a week. Not too shabby if I do say so myself! (And I’ll address the meds at my next doc appointment and hopefully drop one and change another so I won’t have to battle my medication as well as everything else.)
The year that was 2012 brought many ups and downs in my life (and not just the number on the scale). I quit my job in October. I was tired of all the stress and decided it was time for a change. I’ve been enjoying being a SAHM for now. After Thanksgiving my Dad was diagnosed with non-operable stage-4 pancreatic cancer. That came as a shock. I’ve shed many tears and have cherished the time I get to spend with him. He’s on his second round of 3 weeks on 1 week off of chemo and will continue that for another month before he has a PET scan to see what the chemo has done. He’s been doing amazing! With the type of chemo he gets, it’s unlikely he’ll lose his hair. While I’m working my ass off to lose weight, he’s doing everything he can to gain.
I’m once again working on a 3-month health challenge. I’m utilizing the Slim in 6 series and again attempting the couch-5k program. I’d like to participate in the Color Run and the OKC Memorial Run—both in April. My daughter is doing the training with me because you know, who wants to do the Color Run by herself? :) Depending on how well I’m jogging (or wogging in my case) at the first of March will determine whether or not I enter the 5k or half-marathon for the Memorial. Optimistic I know but I’ve had a dream to run at least the half-marathon for that race for a long time. If not this year, it will be next.
One thing I noticed with her—both Monday with the c25k training Monday and her doing Biggest Loser workout on the Wii tonight—is that even though she may be a healthy weight, her stamina just wasn’t there. She tried to sprint the first 1-minute run and had to walk before the minute was up. The next few times, even though she slowed down, I had better stamina than she did. Tonight she was doing some yoga poses (Warrior, etc.) and had trouble holding them. It really opened my eyes that we (the kids and I) need to workout more as a family. I don’t need to depend on the exercising they are doing at school to be enough. We need to work on their core.

 

Time goes on July 3, 2012

Filed under: Exercise, Food, Goals — dawnyalh @ 12:38 pm

And yet I’ve stood still…or so it seems. Can’t remember the last time I posted anything here. (I’m sure I could look it up.) To say I was derailed would be an understatement. When I figured out we wouldn’t be able to take our amazing trip last month, the wind went out of my sails and I stopped trying as hard. Attempted a challenge at the beginning of the year only to drop out with 6 weeks left because I was just so overwhelmed with everything. I ended up gaining 15 more pounds in the interim…putting me back up to 305.

I started a new challenge yesterday and I’m determined to stick to it. Slim in 6 is going to be my friend. :) I’m on day two and already woke up with a massive migraine that sidelined this morning’s workout. I have the DVD loaded and ready to play. I’m going to have to do it tonight…I HAVE to do it so I can “earn” the extra calories. I’m not sure what is wrong with me but I’m hunger. All. The. Time. I’ve been having small 100 calorie or less snacks and waiting 30-45 minutes between eating them to make sure I’m full drinking a lot of water but it doesn’t seem to help. I’m just going to take it as is and try to make the healthiest choices possible.

I signed up again to do the Race for the Cure in September. I’m going to be better prepared this time with my inhaler and going to work on the c25k program. I guess that’s about it in a nutshell.

 

It’s been a while October 18, 2011

Filed under: Exercise, Food, Goals, Weight Loss — dawnyalh @ 10:52 am

This is my life. It tends to get in the way of my blogging. What can I say? My weight loss is going FANTASTIC. I couldn’t ask for better results! I’ve lost 10 pounds in the last month with 5.7 of them coming off in the last two weeks and that was with Mother Nature’s visit. I’m now down to 279.1. Again I had to look twice because the weight didn’t register when I looked at it. I’m not in the 280s anymore. Most days when I log my calories into MFP it now tells me I can be in the 260s in 5 weeks. It always brings a smile to my face.

The past couple of weekends I have had some excessive eating/drinking. Two weeks ago was the Girl’s Weekend out so that one was completely planned and expected. Back on track Monday morning. Went to the Zoo on Saturday and walked for a couple of hours and then Mom treated us to Golden Corral where I did fine up until the end and went overboard on desserts. It wasn’t near what it would’ve been in the past but I did eat to being completely miserable.

Yesterday we ate at the Arches for dinner and then I was famished (yes famished) last night and snacked on cookies and chips and dip. My healthy portion of my eating hasn’t been where it needs to be. I am logging what I eat though and I did go through a couple of weeks where I was barely getting 1200 calories. I’m guessing my body just needed the extra calories and the carrot sticks just didn’t sound good.

I wish I could say I’ve been exercising like a mo-fo but that is pretty much non-existent except for the 2 hikes from a couple weeks ago and the walking at the Zoo. I just can’t get myself motivated to do it. I signed up to do the World Run Day on Nov. 5 and committed to a 5k and haven’t done any running/jogging/walking since the Race on Sept. 17. I keep telling myself “you need to start” and then don’t. I was going to yesterday and then the I’m getting sick excuse came up. I am getting sick with a sore throat, chest hurting, aching all over like I’m coming down with the flu but it just seems like I can come up with any excuse to keep from doing any exercise.

I keep trying to tell myself just set a date that you are going to start exercising at the very least but then I shy away from it. I don’t know if I’m afraid if I start doing it that I’m going to do too much and then fail or what but I need to figure it out. I really do like to exercise once I start. I can’t get myself to the starting line.

 

Potluck September 21, 2011

Filed under: Food — dawnyalh @ 11:52 am

That one word has never struck such fear and loathing in me before. It has now. It’s also brought out my inner toddler who wants to throw a temper tantrum and say “I don’t wanna do it!” We are having a birthday dinner celebration for a coworker tomorrow and the original plan was to grill out and either chip in with a few bucks to help with the cost of the meat or bring your own to grill out. Perfect! I was gonna stop at the store and pick up a morning star turkey burger and bring my 100 calorie Sara Lee bun and have some Special K Cracker Crisps. Nice meal. Well managed calories. No biggie. But wait. The plans got changed and the cursed word potluck got thrown out there.

They don’t want to grill out since we are still under a burn ban. Technically we can grill out since the location is on concrete & well within the boundaries of being away from flammable vegetation.

There are several reason why a potluck sounds horrible to me right now.

  1. You can never get a decent calorie count for one since you don’t know how everyone prepares their food.
  2. The foods people are bringing are calorie and fat laden foods that just don’t sound good to  me right now. A couple of months ago I would’ve been all over a potluck and been signing up for at least two dishes to bring.
  3. After the Race on Saturday I had not one but two lunches—one at Olive Garden and one at Lonestar Steakhouse—and then had another basic potluck for a friend’s birthday that used up all those calories I burned. I skipped all the appetizers and dressing soaked salad at the Garden and passed on the yummy looking cake.
  4. It just plain costs a lot to participate—both in time and money. You have to buy the ingredients for whatever you are making and then make the crap after dinner. We’ve already bought groceries for the week and have nothing left over to buy on anything else.

If I don’t participate then I’m not being a team player and if I do then I’m either skimping on calories elsewhere or working my ass off to burn off said calories. Can you tell my inner toddler has really been having fun since yesterday afternoon? I got home and checked out the fridge and pantry. We have a large bag of broccoli and some cheese and could bring broccoli and cheese but someone is already bringing the nice fattening broccoli cheese casserole. There really is nothing else left. So Jeff and I rearranged our menu planning and I’m going to be bringing the Easy Beef Goulash we had planned for Thursday’s dinner. We are bringing in the Southwestern Chicken Roll ups that weren’t made the week before into its slot.

For me, it’s all about the planning. There is plenty of notice for planning this potluck out. And I did have it planned out. Then I had to change it all up again and it pissed me off. I don’t want a 1000 calorie lunch this week. And that’s what a potluck is to me..at least at this point in my life. I know this is a lifestyle change and it’s all about adapting my choices while still living my life. So my choice for tomorrow will be to eat my portion of goulash I had planned for dinner & some veggies.

 

Resorting to drinking and pills August 22, 2011

Filed under: Food, Weight Loss — dawnyalh @ 10:40 am

It sounds so rebellious and on a downward spiral I know. I wish. My damn digestive system is still giving me horrible, horrible fits. Horrible. Throw another one in there for good measure. I really don’t know what the deal is. I make a conscience effort to eat healthier and exercise and my stomach revolts. You would think I would be hearing something like

Dawnyal, Dawnyal she’s our gal

Eating healthy’s really swell.

Broccoli and fiber’s such a treat!

All this new food is really neat!

Go Dawnyal!

But no, I get the revolt of the century and get things more along the lines of “Damn Bitch, give us back the unhealthy crap. How do you like the rolls and punches? Want more? We can give you more!!!” Yeah that’s what it’s felt like this past week. I have felt bloated, gassy, heartburn and just downright uncomfortable. Sometimes eating makes it feel better, sometimes it makes it feel worse.

Yesterday I started taking Prevacid. At least I didn’t wake up with the pain so I hope it’s a step in the right direction. Now for the drinking part. :D I’m doing a modified fast today to try and cleanse my system in case I have some sort of blockage. I’ve been going regularly but it hasn’t been the “S” curve consistency Dr. Oz preaches on. Without going into much detail on it, let’s just say it’s not been my regular. Today it’s V8, V8 fusion, and fruits and veggies. I know I could take the time to make my own juices but the key word there would be time. Something I’m severely limited on this week. Jeff’s birthday on Friday, party for him and youngest son on Saturday, followed by WWE Raw for the family on Monday on my five-year-old’s birthday. Not to mention I get to mow the lawn this week to prepare for said party and finish up the laundry all while squeezing in work and exercise. I’m getting tired just typing all of that.

I am going to make one of Dr. Oz’s Green Drinks for dinner tonight and depending on how I feel or how hungry I get, I may continue the liquids tomorrow. I just want my heartburn hostilities to stop. Oh and I lost Zero pounds this week despite staying under calories and exercising. Not discouraged in the least, just stating this morning’s weigh in.

 

I did it in the pool! August 19, 2011

Filed under: Exercise, Food, Goals, Weight Loss — dawnyalh @ 11:11 am

It’s not as kinky as it sounds. That would’ve required my honey pie to be in the pool with me and ablsiter whole lot less kids out of there for that to happen. LOL.

The blister on my right foot I got when doing c25k w1d1 on Tuesday is still giving me fits. (See photo to the right and please ignore my dry heel. I really need some pampering in that area. Time for a parafin dip or something.)

As I mentioned yesterday about attempting w1d2 and not making it, I didn’t want to be deterred. I’m all about being innovative and improvising.

innovative |ˈinəˌvātiv|
adjective
(of a product, idea, etc.) featuring new methods; advanced and original

New Oxford American Dictionary

Yep. That’s me. Queen Innovator. I’ve become quite good at it, especially after I became a mom.

I figured why not just do the laps in the pool. Sure I might get dizzy going in circles but I could still get the benefits of the walking/jogging intervals. Other than not having speakers to hook my phone into and it not being very loud, it worked out pretty well. I just had Lilly stand by the ladder at the end to tell me when my beeps hit so I could start/stop jogging on time. I did start getting shin splints from the water pushing on them but once I was done, the pain went away.

The down side to working out in the pool was it was at my mom’s and I had to do it after dinner and after being on the phone with Dish network for over 30 minutes. That means we didn’t get home until after 9. I went ahead and ate my scheduled night time snack of a fiber one peanut butter chocolate brownie.  It put me at just over 1200 calories for yesterday. That was the only food I ate after 9 p.m.

I also woke up with horrible heartburn. The heartburn didn’t start until I started changing the way I’m eating. I’ve been eating the smaller portions more frequently and it’s helped. As long as I’ve eaten those snacks at bedtime, I haven’t been waking up with the heartburn. This morning, it was the worst yet. I even lay back down after chomping on Tums. Ended up falling back asleep and coming in to work late. I was already a couple of hours over that I could burn so that wasn’t a biggie. I don’t know if the extra fiber I’m adding into my diet is causing it or what. I just know that I’ve NEVER had this problem outside of being pregnant and I know that’s not the cause.

But…I do have one amazing positive! I am wearing a navy blue mini skirt I paid a buck for off the clearance rack a couple of years ago and was never able to squeeze my fat ass into complete with a red 22/24 shirt that was also too tight. Yay me!

Upcoming

  • Biggest Loser workout on the Wii tonight
  • C25k w1d3 workout either in my yard or in the pool if blister isn’t better.
  • A look back at the ghosts of my dieting past. I do believe I may have learned something.
 

A new mini-goal August 18, 2011

Filed under: Food, Goals — dawnyalh @ 9:16 am

My nighttime snacking has gotten severely out of control. I’m well within my calories (way under even) but I just find myself munching and munching and munching. Sometimes I’m hungry; other times it’s more the hand-to-mouth disease.

I don’t want to set a rule of no eating after a certain time because I just take that as a challenge to push the limits with a battle of will power. I suck at will power. Yeah I know Oprah said she did wonderful with no eating after 7 p.m. Hell half the time I’m not even home until 7:30 or 8 by the time I go pick up the kids from mom and dad’s and eat dinner at their house. Instead, I’m going to set myself a small mini-goal of no eating at 9 p.m. for the next week. It’s feasible for me. It has a start and stop time and if I’m hungry and I can adjust my breakfast the next morning. (Who knows I might like it so much, I will just stick with it)

I think I just freak myself out when I look at MFP and see 400 calories or whatnot leftover, especially when I workout in the evenings and it adds on the extra calories that I can have to the end of the day. I somehow feel I need to eat those extra calories.

Shoot I even had a conversation something like this with myself last night:

Me1: Wow! I’ve only had just over 1300 calories today. After adding in my exericse it shows I should have around 1830 calories. That’s still 500 calories left I could spend.

Me2: You know if you don’t spend them that’s about 1/5 of a pound less you will have to lose.

Me1: But what if I’m eating too few calories? I know I’ll go pop a 100 calorie popcorn. Yeah that sounds good to have while watching TV.

Meanwhile a bit later:

Me2: That’s only 1400 calories you’ve had today AND you’ve exercised. Don’t you think you need to stuff that face with more calories?

Me1: I’m not really hungry. I think I should go to sleep.

Me2: But you need those calories.

This would be me taking my big butt into the kitchen and grabbing out my carefully counted out apple-cinnamon quakes from the pantry and eating them to bring my calorie count to 1552 for yesterday. And you know what? My scale this morning reflected a slight gain. Not sure what it was since I keep it on the BMI on the wii fit except on Monday mornings when I officially weigh in.

I need to learn to follow my intuition and not let my inner fat foodie dictate my life. I know I love just about any kind of food and would eat 24/7. That’s not going to happen if I want to be healthy and have a few pounds fall off in the process. What have I learned? Listen to my body and no eating after 9 p.m. this week!

 

Trust your gut August 3, 2011

Filed under: Food — dawnyalh @ 2:15 pm

Even though I was way under on my calories and I scheduled in an evening snack, I wasn’t hungry on Monday. What did I do? I ate the snack anyway. That’s led to two nights of night time snacking. Had I listened to my inner self I would’ve just stayed way under my calories and not ate the evening snack. I am not worried about it. If tonight I have the same problem, I will start being concerned. For today, I’m okay.

Yes, this one is short, sweet and to the point. I have been super busy beyond words and will continue to be that way for the next few days as everyone gets ready for their new schedules with school. I’m continuing to plan my meals and exercise and taking it day by day.

 

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