Fighting the Dark Cloud of pudge!!

Well, I am down .6 of a pound.  Who knew basking and robbins could do that!! Actually, I am sure the trimming of my hair on Thursday had some impact.  But why look a gift loss in the mouth, right??

Thanks, Sarah, for your email.  I hope to be a positive influence in many student’s lives, but at least I can reach out to this girl who needs it.

I am quite stressed right now, as usual.  The university course I will be teaching in person starts on Wed.  I have taught the course three times online, but never in person.  So, timing etc is a bit of a concern.  No doubt it will work out in the end.  I find it ironic that the university coupled me with a new teacher to train to teach the course - especially since I have never taught it in person before.  I have no recollection of anyone mentoring me, but what the hay.  I don’t mind.  Sometimes having to teach someone else only makes me learn it better.

Meanwhile, the MEd that I am taking is very confusing. It is an online course.  The programme they use is not very user friendly.  We are given instructions that are  very convoluted and written in high academic language.  In all honesty, I rarely find anyone who says anything worthwhile when using high brow English.  AND I hate when it takes 20 minutes to figure out what a couple of paragraphs mean simply because the author wanted to show off her/his vocabulary.  All of my postings are in every day English.  I figure that if I have something to say, everyone needs to understand it!!  So, I cannot figure out how to use the programme.  The assignments are vague do I cannot really figure out what they want.  Naturally we get no feedback so who knows if we are on the right course.  I have until midnight tomorrow to post my summary (of an equally vague and pretentious article) or maybe I am not supposed to do that.  Perhaps I am supposed to just comment on the summary of the readings written by the presenting group.  AND do we all really need to read the 45 page convoluted pretentious articles if a group will summarize them for us?  (and how convoluted must an article of 45 pages be if it can be summed up in two power point slides?!!)

WHY AM I TAKING THIS DEGREE???  I DO NOT EVEN NEED IT!  I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE INTERESTING…SO, when does the interesting part come into it?!!  You know, I now see why I dropped this damn programme twice in the past!  The course I am taking is the one required course for the programme.  I am hoping it gets better with the next course.  If not, I will consider dropping it AGAIN!  I won;t even go into the fact that I already have a Masters degree so if I cannot figure it out what hope do the people who are fresh out of a bachelor’s degree have?!!  Or maybe they are gearing the course to the PHd students in the class and ignoring our needs.  Hmmm..

OK, enough ranting for the end of Sept!

Cheers!

Hey there.  I am still being highly stressed although the much anticipated budget follow up meeting was anticlimatic.  I never really know if the stress is the build up suspense or the actual event.  In this case it ended in a slight fizzle and things seem back to normal.  No need to freak out, threaten to quit or anything.  I am certainly glad, but the lead up gave me enough cardio workout to last me a while!

I have noticed that one of the less popular girls at school is even more withdrawn than usual.  She has been trying to lose weight but her mother (who is also overweight) has not been all that supportive.  They live by the idea of the magic diet pill/tea that will solve all their problems.  (if only, if only..).  Sadly I think this girl has little at home supporting her in anything, and obviously not much at school as the “queen bees” have not deemed her someone worthy of their interest.  She is a nice girl - bit socially awkward (ok, who isn’t in high school, but perhaps more than most in that dept).

So, I decided to ask her if she was still dieting.  She told me she is but not really getting anywhere.  Figuring as much, I asked her if she would help me out by being my diet buddy.  Anything that makes her feel special seems to really interest her so she jumped at the opportunity.  I had brought the week 1 WW booklet, suspecting she may go for it.  This evening I hunted out a previous “Getting started” ww book (as if I don;t have several hanging around based on my on again off again love affair with WW.  I am hoping that this helps both of us out. With this girl in particular I think she needs the teacher who takes an interest in her to really allow her to blossom into the young woman she is meant to be.

Other than that, my week has been stressful.  Possibly a slight weight loss, but the entire box of Mac and Cheese and the cone from baskin robbins may change that.  OK, the mac and cheese was last night.  Regardless, I am feeling the pudge right now so I need to focus and get on with it.

Cheers blog buddies.

My stress this week has been off the charts.  My boss (control freak) is upset that the students and staff support my ideas and programmes (after all I am in charge of programmes for the school).  So, her infinite wisdom has caused her to try to tie my hands by controlling (over controlling) my budget.  Imagine someone saying I cannot spend $100 or more without her approval!!  I mean $100!! What can I get for that!  I have been going nuts.  She even freaked out when I put a hold on a FREE cabinet from another school!!  She challenged that there could be delivery charges!  OY!!

Add to that, a huge fight with DH and the fact he still has not got a full time job and is really not even looking!

According to my scale I was up 4 pounds.  DH even said that was impossible as I was not eating a lot!  I tell you, stress does it.  Anyway, final WW weigh in showed a 2.4 gain.  Noting that it takes me months to lose that much I am quite disheartened.  Not totally disheartened as I plan to up the level of effort, but disheartened none the less.

Things have improved with DH who is now making a job effort.  We will see how long that lasts.  As for work, I plan to take control at budget meeting part 2 on Wed.  If she insists on tying my hands, I will resign as head of Programmes and simply be a teacher - something I had considered last year but she blocked me getting any other jobs (yes I have proof, not just sour grapes!  I am not the only one she did THAT too).  this will leave her to deal with the fact she may not have someone willing to take this over unless a coworker steps up - which I have no problem with.  Next year I am on sabbatical and if I do not have another job BEFORE then, I hope to find something while on leave.

So, you can see how stressed I am.  Oh and on the dog front, I think she might fly in from Winnipeg next weekend.

Shana Tova to all those celebrating the New Year this weekend.

Yes, I tried a new and exciting title for my WW update!  This week I lost .2 pounds.  Or, I suppose 1/4 of a pound.  I am resolved to the fact I will lose very slowly and I am really happy that I am now 202.8 as opposed to 203.  Each week I aim for a 1 pound loss and this week the scale was not budging - at least not until Friday and then reverted back on Sat (just before the weigh in naturally).  Ideally I will aim to be in the 201s next week but I won’t be upset if I manage to stay in the 202s at a slightly lower number after the decimal point.  Inch by inch, right?

This week’s stress…well the Admin team have decided to stick their nose into things again.  Suffice to say that we (staff and me) turned an entire school around in a year, and our reputation is improving!  Suffice to say that the Admin team wants some of the credit (even though the improvements occurred because I refused to follow their ideas) and I am actually cool with them taking some, or even all, the credit if I am left alone to do what I do.  Now all their other schools want to copy what we are doing so they can improve SO OF COURSE the admin team are now trying to change what we do to do it cheaper (and inevitably less effectively).  OK, I did spend the entire budget last year (and a few hundred from this  year’s as I miscalculated) BUT then again at my interview I was told I had the money to spend!! (Of course I was also told there were no behaviour problem kids and I found the school being basically run by gang members).

Mom has 99% decided to get a dog!  DH is upset with this as we will inevitably inherit this dog.  Suspecting she would get a dog anyway, I did contact my dog’s breeder and she located a 6 year old female whose previous owners did not take good dental care of so now has no teeth.  Photos show a real cutie and I am sure my guy will get along with her.  We are waiting to see if we can return if it does not work out.  Her price is the flight to Toronto from Winnipeg.  Much cheaper than the $3500 the backyard breeder wanted for the 1 year old yorkie (who peed on Mom’s bed!)

DH is still only working part time.  DH finds a reason why “they won’t hire him” for every job posting I give him.  DH does have savings from before we were married he is drawing from but I find the whole thing very frustrating.  At first we could blame the recession; now it is pure laziness.  (Please feel free to object to this in your comments if you are so moved!)

Toronto International Film Festival(TIFF) is underway.  We are seeing The Disappearance of Alice Creed at 9:15 this evening.  I bought the three show package where the TIFF programmers choose movies for you.  So, we have this one from the UK, one from India on Thursday and one from Russia on Friday.  My concern with tonight’s show is it is late for me to watch a “thriller”.  I am not that keen on thrillers in the first place but right before bed can interfere with a good night’s sleep for me!  Yes, I am OLD!

Other than that, the sun is shining and my blessings are more numerous than my beefs (contrary to what this posting probably sounded like).

Cheers!

My goal this week was to a lose a pound.  I did not lose a pound, but I did loose .4 of a pound.  I was pleased with that.  At this point I am trying to judge how much I can consistently lose each week and had hoped it was 1 pound.  Now I am thinking perhaps it is .5 of a pound.  Really, when I lose weight YEARS ago, it took me a year to lose 19 pounds, so perhaps .5 a week is more realistic.  At the end of the day, the fact it is going down rather than staying the same or going up is what counts.

I signed up for another 6 months of WW today.  My coupons finally ended.  The dreams I had when I first bought those!  Granted my first week was amazing, with a loss of 4.2.  But then came the stress and I gained all but one pound back over the following weeks.  Having said that, I did manage to lose about 4.5 pounds in that 12 weeks.  A small number, but still a number!

Last Monday I had dinner with  friend I had not seen since my wedding roughly a year ago.  Growing up she had been a model - so quite slim.  She was heavy, for her, at my wedding, and I did not recognize her when I saw her outside the restaurant.  She has a myriad of health issues now - some I had heard of and some I had not.  One of the side effects she has is obesity.  Unlike my fat -which has had time to evenly migrate around my body - her fat weight gain (I am guessing 30- 40 lbs this last year) has all settled on her stomach, neck and face.  I really feel for her.  True, she still weighs less than I do and has about 5″ of height on me, but it is hard to deal with the health issues AND the weight gain.  She told me she is trying to stablize at 172 (unheard of in the past when she rarely weighed more than 110).  I suggested WW to her.  How quickly I forgot that “skinny” people have no idea how to diet.  She did not know where to go or what to do.  I think WW would be a good start for her.

After seeing someone with so many health issues at the same age as me, I realize how lucky I am and it changes my view point of my pudge.  Not that I want to keep my pudge, but it put it into a different perspective.

So, I am content with my .4 weight loss and will continue down the same road I am travelling.  Who knows, maybe next week I will actually lose a pound, but if it is .4, I think I should be happy with that.

Cheers, blog buds