It’s all up to me

Current weight: 217 (-1.5)

Readjusting to life in the counselor’s office after being away for 5 years reminds me of how chaotic it is. Today I didn’t get to eat lunch until 2:00, school is out at 2:20. Since Friday I have had 3 suicidal kids but I know enough to know that this stuff goes in streaks. I’m just hoping that a day will come where there’s no drama and a bit of quiet time. I’m not going to hold my breath, but I’ll just appreciate it when it happens.

Yesterday my hubby forced me to sleep ing (until 5) instead of getting up at 4 to workout. The exhaustion from being up w/Kyle the night before got to me. I was able to get up this morning and workout, though, so I’m back on track.

We took Kyle to the ENT to see if his ear tubes were plugged and the right one was. Our regular ENT doc is out so we met w/someone new and I can’t wait for our old doc to return. You may recall that he’s Dr. McDreamy so for that reason I want him back, but this doctor made me so angry. Once he realized that the wax/tissue build-up was too great to take care of that way he told me he would have to remove the tube so Kyle didn’t continue to get sick. OK, fine. I knew it would hurt a bit but that it was necessary. No exaggeration, I haven’t heard Kyle cry in over a year, he just doesn’t cry. He whimpers and moans but doesn’t cry. He was screaming, sobbing and crying. The procedure took about 5 minutes and was done w/o sedation and that’s not even what I had a problem with. After it was done the doctor tried to convince me that he was crying b/c he was being held down, not b/c he was in pain. Bull$hit. I know that docs who say that are trying to comfort me as the mom but don’t give me that load of crap. Acknowledge that he’s in pain, that it was necessary to do it and that he’ll be better soon. I know the doc wasn’t trying to intentionally hurt him but don’t talk down to me like I don’t know my own kid. Grrrr.

I’m concerned about making it through the weekend w/o completely falling off plan. I need to think tomorrow about how to avoid this. Actually, I know HOW to do it but the question is am I willing to put in the work and effort?

Progress toward workout goal: 106/300

Current weight: 218.5 (-.5)

Last night was a bad flashback to the times when Kyle wasn’t sleeping. He did really well until about 1 am and then he was up off and on until I gave up and got up at 4:00. I wasn’t too tired until about 1 pm this afternoon and then I hit the wall. All of a sudden a craving hit for Happy Joe’s pizza (it’s a restaurant in this area and sooooo yummy) and I was going to skip my workout this afternoon. But I decided that I was going to push through and stick to the original plan and I did it! I did the Cardio Max BL workout, even though I didn’t like it I did it all. I’m sure it’s a good workout but it’s very choppy and has too many weights for my cardio days since I lift heavy weights 3 days a week. But being all sweaty gave me the momentum to make healthy choices for supper and now it’s about 2 1/2 hours until bed so I think I can hang. Yay, me!

The house is a done deal except for the inspection. Hubby is coming around to the idea, although he’s still wishing we could have gotten more. The big issue is that we can’t afford to finish the whole basement now, but then we realized that even if we had gotten full asking price that we couldn’t have afforded it anyway. I didn’t realize how much of the basement we were going to finish. The family room alone is over 900 square feet; our current home is only 1150. Now that he knows that he has settled down a bit b/c then it’s “only” money. But since this will be our last move it’s not a big deal if we’re 10K behind b/c over the course of 30 years, 10K is no big deal.

Justin is making buddies at school so that’s a huge weight off my shoulders. As we were leaving today this sweet little girl gave that little girl wave and said bye to him and he has played w/the same little boy at recess for the last 2 days. I’m so glad. Give me a kids w/academic troubles any day over a kid who has social problems. I have had 2 kids over the last 3 days in my office who were suicidal b/c of social issues.

I was at the same store tonight where I ran into my Barry’s Bootcamp deal and saw Leg Magic for $29.99. It’s normally $130. Has anyone used it? I wanted to get it when it first came out but I don’t want to start filling up our basement w/a bunch of crap. Ooh, I almost forgot to mention. Since the family room is going to be so huge, I’m going to carve out a room about 10′ x 14′ as a dedicated gym when we do finish it. I’ll have my treadmill and future elliptical in there, a weight bench and weights and a tv I can watch while on cardio equipment or use to do workout DVDs. I’m also going to get the rubber flooring since it will be over concrete. Fancy, schmancy, huh? You’re all invited to come over and play when it gets done, but it might be a year or two down the road.

Progress toward workout goal: 105/300