I’m taking a day off
I stayed home sick today. It was one of those days where you don’t feel well but could muddle through if necessary, but then I remembered that the kids are doing research in the computer lab so it would be an easy day for a substitute. So needless to say I didn’t exercise. I know, me, taking a day off from exercise. But what’s even more incredible is that I have stuck to my diet. This is the first time in I don’t know how long that I have done that. It’s an empowering feeling.
It’s a feeling that I need to remember b/c I’m not going to exercise tomorrow, either. It’s our anniversary and since it’s next to impossible to get a sitter due to our son’s medical needs, we’re going out to dinner at 3:00 tomorrow afternoon. We have nursing until 4:30 and our older son can stay at the day care at his school for an hour or so. We are going to the place that we went to on our 1st date, I’ll be able to choose a healthy entree. But I already know that we’re going to split a decadent piece of chocolatey-fudge cake. I don’t normally like chocolate cake but this stuff is worth every freakin’ bite.
For all of you who are caught up in my hubby-drama, we talked last night. I won’t say it went well, but at least we talked about it. He’s hurt that I even considered the fact that he could be cheating; I tried explaining that I really didn’t think that he was but that ON PAPER it could be a viable explanation. Turns out he’s much more stressed this semester than I realized. So I am going to try to put my frequent need for reassurance and affection on hold until 2009; if things don’t improve at that point then we’ll revisit the topic. But I know it took a lot for him to admit that he’s completely overwhelmed and not sure if he can do it all so I’m willing to wait a while longer to get my regular hubby back. I promise that I’m not settling or putting myself last, it’s just that right now is my time to give and his to take. If things don’t get more balanced next semester than I’ll voice my opinion, I promise.
Happy Anniversary! I hope you feel better soon, and I hope you and the hubby are able to have a lovely meal tomorrow to celebrate your time together, no matter what kind of bumps you may be going through at the moment. Remember to savour that cake, love it, delight in it, and it’s ok! Everything in moderation, right?
I’ve been gone for awhile abut I’ve got to say- congrats on your anny! And enjoy your cake!
And congrats on doing so well with your exercise! Wish I could be doing the same :)The fact that you’re committed to your diet even without it though shows major success!!
Glad to see that you and hubbby are talking through some of the issues, and that there may be an end in sight. I know that people always say that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but that’s just the average. On any given day it can be 60/40 or 10/90, but as long as things even out eventually it’s just fine.
Hey, don’t feel like you need to justify or be apologetic about the decisions you make on working things thru! Do what feels right. We’ve all been through those ups and downs, and if this is the time for you to be the “giver” in the relationship, you shouldn’t feel like you have to justify that. Getting off my soapbox now : )
Oh, and thanks for planting the seed… I neeeeeeed chocolate cake now.
Happy belated anniversary! 9/29 was my wedding anniversary too. Congrats.
I think tiny2b has a very good point. We all take turns being the “giver” in our marriages and relationships. I know my hubby loves it when I give him a foot rub or make his fave meals, especially when he’s maxxed out at work. He’s usually the one taking care of me in that way, so its nice for him.
Happy Anniversary!! And hope you feel better. That is good you were able to have a talk with your husband and able to hear his side of things. At least you know RIGHT NOW that his stress is at the root of the problem and can work around that. And I say that suzeeeq has a good point there. Maybe you can find somethings to relieve his stress or at least relax him a little. That may help put things in the mood.
FEEL BETTER — and enjoy that cake!
So glad you talked to hubby, Brandie. You have no need to apologize. You’re not avoiding the issue, you’ve dealt with it. You weren’t imagining it, something is wrong. It’s good that the “something” is school and stress and not health issues or other nasty things. Marriage is not easy and it takes a lot of work. Right now, it sounds like you’re both working hard at it. It’s going to get so much better when things settle down.
Enjoy your anniversary! There’s nothing like a really good chocolate cake! Eat some for me.
Hugs!