Well, I gave the Intuitive Eating a few months. It was nice to take a break from dieting, BUT, I lost maybe 2 pounds in 2 months and was fooling myself that I wasn’t actually still eating with the diet mentality. The excercises from Women, Food, and God that I did on the Oprah site seemed pscho-babbly to me. Despite actually being a (school) psychologist, I have more faith in cognitive behavior changes than overthinking emotional reasons for what you want to stop doing.
So, I need to eat less and move more. Weight Watchers may or may not work for me again, especially doing the free, use old materials, online support boards version; but then again it may. This picture is a reminder that I have actually been near my goal weight this decade. And I did it on Weight Watchers program.
Posted on July 28th, 2010 by bonnie824
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I am feeling sad and nostalgic this week. Father’s days are as hard now as Mother’s days were for the first years without my mom. My dad died in 2008 so this is my second year without him. His last father’s day was very hard as we all knew he was dying and it would be the last. He died in July.
I have been scanning old pictures in my computer of him and of my husband and our kids when they were small. I miss my parents. I miss my youth. I miss being young, pretty, much thinner.
The lack of any weight loss the last twice I weighed is not helping. I am still enjoying more excercise and not counting or leaving food groups out of my life, but emotionally I am feeling stagnant and old.
Posted on June 18th, 2010 by bonnie824
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Prayer for Strength in Dieting Lord, I need your help! You have set a bounteous table in front of me which I have enjoyed time and time again and for which I am grateful! But it seems I may have enjoyed this a little too much and my body is reflecting the bounty! Please help me to choose healthy foods to know that I will be fully satisfied with smaller portions and give me the strength to resist overeating. Amen.
Posted on June 13th, 2010 by bonnie824
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So it’s been quite a while since I posted for a variety of reasons. Work is busier, home is less time alone-ish. But mostly just the freedom from calorie counting, food restriction, researching new diet ideas has made me care a lot less about online support boards and about spending so much of my time talking about weight loss. Online is more fun now discussing politics, family, entertainment. It’s a wide world out there of things to focus on.
But-I did lose another 2 pounds at my weekly or less weigh in and am happy about that. I have enjoyed swimming and water aerobics without letting myself stress about the body in a bathing suit in public. In fact my suit is getting worn with so much use and I’m going to buy another, or two. Comfortable suits. No body slimming torture fabric. I am feeling so much happier about myself lately. Despite finding Women, food, and God kind of silly and woo woo and disapointing. The actual idea/theory behind the whining (my parents ruined me and that’s why I’m fat) and bulimia journals is still solid and right for me.
Posted on June 5th, 2010 by bonnie824
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In looking at my reasons for emotional eating, the feeling of loneliness seems to be an issue for me. Yet, I am most often surrounded with people and after a period of time, crave time alone like crazy. Maybe what I am lonely for is not the family and friends and pets I love, but the old best girlfriend kind of real life friend. Maybe it’s my mom, whose loss never stops hurting. Or maybe people are always truly alone unless they have a full time feeling of God with them, instead of the once in awhile feeling I have lately.
It’s hard to know whether I need to seek outside or inside. But I do think that lonely, even in a crowd of people I love, is one of my eating issues.
Posted on May 15th, 2010 by bonnie824
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Just in time to revive my enthusiasm for Intuitive Eating, and my faith that it is what I need at this point, the Oprah special was so touching and inspiring. I need to return the other book to the library, so I ordered this and can’t wait for it to come in.
Posted on May 13th, 2010 by bonnie824
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Well I’m on the last step, and it seems to be about eating nutritious, kind of loosely keeping the food pyramid in mind. I’m glad to see it, since so far, this has honestly mostly been about me getting to eat things I’ve been not eating. I did initially lose a few pounds from watching how much I ate and trying not to eat when I was not hungry, but I have kind of been hitting or missing on that this week. 
Posted on May 13th, 2010 by bonnie824
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The move more, natural exercise, do things you enjoy has not worked the best very far. My exercise instructor was out of town , so we walked the dogs a little at the park last week, I did the weight machines once, and we had some fun walking around the Celtic Festival. It still feels like something I have to do 2-3 times a week though, and not something I like to do every day. I can’t say the days I didn’t go on purpose to exercise that I got 30 minutes a day of fun movement. I am hoping once it’s warm enough for the pool, that will add to my movement fun.
I like yoga but not the classes so much. I am always the worse and worried about it. I just need to plan a quiet and private want to make a plan for doing some yoga at home. I’ll check out the “on demand” schedule. Even 10 minutes of AM and 10 of PM would make a difference I think. If I did the more peaceful, meditative yoga, I know I would also benefit spiritually, since I have in the past. I will plan a private time and place each day to do it.
Posted on May 10th, 2010 by bonnie824
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What an idea this was. I had always read and heard that wearing your clothes a little tight and keeping a smaller size hanging in your closet to try on from time to time were good ideas for getting yourself to a healthy attractive weight and size.
I have also fight buying 16 pants and DD bras. I look for brands that are made big. When I have to buy the larger sizes I like to cut the tags out immediately. I only buy enough clothes to get by, not wanting to buy a lot in this size, and waiting for the time I can go shopping crazy in size 8 or 10.
Today is a hot muggy day. I wore my one DD bra, a comfortable shirt, and reasonably comfortable capris and am so glad. I will buy a few more bras and some comfortable shorts or capris this week. I will give away things that are really uncomfortable. I imagine the ease of getting dressed in the morning or anytime, without having to decide how puffy I feel, which clothes will kill me, and which will be OK as long as I’m standing up and haven’t recently ate.
Posted on May 6th, 2010 by bonnie824
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Today was a little stressful. My first day as bible school teacher and doing it alone. Four of the six kids were really good, but the other two were in need of my “teacher voice” several times. Then kind of lonely getting lunch myself to bring home as the rest of the family were working or sick. Got home to little “not quite grandaughter” having an accident, throwing a fit, screaming meltdown with her mom, and my son complaining about all of it, leading me to fear he might quit trying and ease away from his new “family”.
My reaction during the run around meltdown stuff was eating all 4 chicken tacos when 2 was plenty, then seriously considering whether a glass of wine was odd or out of place on a Sunday afternoon when they all left. Instead, I’m online though and getting ready to read this chapter and maybe find some other articles on emotional eating online.
Since I don’t eat when really sad, I’ve never thought of myself really as an emotional eater, but in some ways I am. I eat when bored, a little stressed, lonely. I only don’t eat when I’m extremely emotional. Since death and disasters don’t appeal as a way to lose weight, I need to find ways around the littler emotions and needs not met driving me to eat more than I need.
Posted on May 2nd, 2010 by bonnie824
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Well, I gave the Intuitive Eating a few months. It was nice to take a break from dieting, BUT, I lost maybe 2 pounds in 2 months and was fooling myself that I wasn’t actually still eating with the diet mentality. The excercises from Women, Food, and God that I did on the Oprah site seemed pscho-babbly to me. Despite actually being a (school) psychologist, I have more faith in cognitive behavior changes than overthinking emotional reasons for what you want to stop doing.
