So, during all that I gained 17 pounds.  I’ve lost it all.  Most of it was bloat, but some of it was from sitting on my BEHIND days on end and eating lots of cookies! 

Now I’ve been sick..AGAIN.  Saturday hubby took me to the health clinic and I had tonsilitis (sore throat and fever and generally ICKY).  I’ve been on antibiotics and I think they put me on too much because I’ve been super nauseated for the last 3 days.  Like puking my guts up and sick at the sight of food.  I’ve dropped 4.5 pounds though…I’m sure that won’t last, but it would be nice if even 2 stayed gone! 

I’m scheduled for another surgery on the 19th to have my gallbladder out.  I have a large stone at risk of cancer if it gets much bigger.  The killer of it all is I dont have insurance.  So, I’ve managed to put my family in debt by about $30,000 so far in a month and a half!  It’s really depressing.  I’m trying to keep moving though.  I really would like to huddle up in bed and never leave again.  All I can do is pray the Lord will provide.  Hopefully a great job with flexibility in there too!  I’ve not had a job since I was about 18 so that’s not reassuring. 

Weight:  208.6.  (After surger I was 227)  OMG I KNOW!  I was down to 213 before this sickness thing this past weekend.  208 is the lowest I’ve been in about 7 years I believe, so this is kinda nice.  I’ve not been able to lose weight since the school year started.  I just don’t push myself like I do when I work out alone.  I dont run as long and I dont stay at the gym even half of what I used to during summer.  But the upside of that is that I haven’t gained really.  I fluctuate up and down, but generally not gaining.  Trust me, I dont eat like I’m trying to loose weight (mainly on weekends).  I’ve been drinking Dr. Pepper like it’s water and I ate 2 dozen or more chocolate chip cookies by myself last week.  Healthy huh??? 

I’ve been cooking at home more.  We only went out for one meal last week and that was a lunch at chick-fil-a.  Normally we go out about 5-6 times at least.  YAY ME!  That’s what happens when you are now BROKE!  Life’s going to drastically change which sucks.  I love to shop and so does my hubby.  I really did good last week and then I got sick and that was $100 between doc and rx’s.  Stupid! 

I’m still reading everyone’s stuff I just have been reading everything from my ipod so I couldn’t log in to comment.  Good Luck in your journey and we can do it.  Slow and steady keeps it off!!

So are you wondering how I gained 10 pounds in one day????!!!!  New years eve day at about 2pm - we’d taken Cole to a pottery painting place - and I was complaining about cramps.  I’ve been getting weird cramps about 2 weeks into my cycle every month.  I took some ibuproferen but it wasn’t helping.   WE went and ate a late lunch at Olive Garden and I felt better.  That night I started to feel not so good.  Hubby refused to let me go to sleep before midnight so I held on and then felt so bad I couldn’t sleep after that.  Then all day New Years I consistantly was in more pain.  I called my mom who is a non-practicing nurse but still keeps up her license.  She’s one who tells you if you aren’t dying suck it up now!  She asked me where the pain was and it was on my right lower abdomen.  I’d been researching on the web and figured it was my appendix.  She said if it hurts more when you release it’s probably an appendicitis and to go to the ER.  So, I went to take a shower and then we went.  The pain was excrutiating and just got worse.  Had a CT scan and it didn’t show an appendicitis.  They decided to go in anyway laproscopically and see what was going on.  I told them take anything you want - I’d rather you not take my bowel, because you are never the same after that.  Well they had some surgeries take longer so I didn’t get into the operating room until about 3am or so.  I was kinda scared but I was in so much pain I didn’t care.  WElll….I was in a room by 6 am.  I had a twisted Fallopian tube.  Probably had it for a while and it’d just gotten worse.  Much longer I would have cut the blood to it and the ovary and lost them both.  They went ahead and took my appendix too.  They sent it off to pathology so I’ll find out later if there was anything wrong with it.  I was most worried about sedation bc I’d never had the tube before.  But it was just fine and had some great dreams.  Anyways….all the air they pumped into my stomach and the anesthetics have bloated me 10 freakin pounds!   I’m still in quite a bit of pain from my incision sights and I feel like I’ve done a bajillion sit ups.  Oh here’s the catch…No working out for 6 weeks.  Then they want to plan to have my gallbladder out after that and that’s another 6 weeks.  We’ll see how that goes!

I’m alive and kicking.  I cannot sleep on my back so that’s been hard.   Great way to start the new year huh?!?!

I will keep you updated and live my workout life vicariously thru you guys!  So ..GET TO WORK!

Ohhhh.  I got strep throat the week before Christmas and just finished my antibiotics yesterday so there’s been NO working out at all.  You know it’s bad when the doctor says “oooohhhhh wow!  we aren’t even going to run any tests.”  He put me on prednisone also.  I gained 5 pounds in 3 days and said screw it I’m not taking that bad stuff anymore.  Within 2 days I’d lost 4 of the pounds without even trying.  I was in excrutiating pain every time I took a bite of anything but still starving no matter what. 

Anyways.  Hubby came home at 1pm today.  He called at noon and said he was on his way and he was going to stop and get me a coffee (which he never does things like that.)  Well, he didn’t show up and didn’t show up so I went and fixed myself lunch.  He finally get’s home and it’s been 45 minutes.  We live 5 minutes from the coffee shop.  He made all these excuses of having to go to 3 different starbucks because they were out of the certain syrup.  I said who freakin cares order my usual instead of anything special and you shoulda come home.  I was worried something happened to him because the roads are still very icy here - a girl died just today because of it.  He said ‘Oh I’m sure you thought I was out doing something bad.”  Then the coffee was cold and I like it really hot so I went and sat it on the counter and then ate my lean cuisine, took a shower, and got ready.  I told cole that I’d take him to the clay painting place where you can paint your own pottery items and they fire them for you.  So we were all about to leave I go to heat up my coffee so I could have it to drink there and it’s GONE!!!  He said, well you didn’t drink it so I assumed you didn’t like it so I drank it cos you waste everything.  OOOHHHHH I was mad!!!  He didn’t even ask me.  I was in the next room it woulda been so hard.  Then he goes on about how I waste hundreds of dollars worth of stuff and blah blah blah. 

It got worse and worse from there.   A few days before Christmas we got in a huge argument he even called my sister and brought her into it and everything.  MY mom never gets mad about anything was livid and told me to get in the car and come home (10 hr drive).  Well…He left and said he was going to sleep in his truck.  He wound up at a friends house who’s not really a very good guy if you get my drift and then I called him about 10 and we talked for 2 hours and he asked if he could come home to hug me and he’d leave till we had more time to talk.  Like a dumbass I let him and he didn’t leave.  Of course nothings changed.  It lasts a day and we’re back to where we were.

SOoo…Cole and I went to the store to get stuff to cook for dinner.  He called his dad to say hi and he cut cole off and hung up.  I had Cole call him back and ask where he was.  He told him at a friends house and hung up.  Cole was pretty upset.  Then we ate dinner.  He wanted to play the Wii so I said sure and I hopped on the elliptical.  I was so energetic and did about 30 minutes.  I wasn’t satiated with the workout so we went to the gym for 30 minutes.  I ran until I couldn’t breathe and came home.  Told cole to put on pjs and he could call his dad.  Well he called about 4 times within an hour time period.  No answer.  Cole and I played a bunch of hands of uno and then I read to him. 

I came in my room and called him a bunch more.  One time I guess he accidentally answered and it sounded like he was at a bar.  My husband is basically an alcoholic.  He’s very mean when he drinks and then blacks out.  So…lately there’s been absolutely no drinking going on.  (As far as I know).  Not even a beer at dinner or out to eat.  I’m just really mad that he didn’t answer Cole’s calls.  I checked the bank account and he’s been pulling money out of the account and bought a bunch of stuff at walmart.  He wont answer still. 

I just dont know what to do.  He’s under a lot of stress right now and his grandma is on her death bed and we were supposed to drive a couple hours to go see her tomorrow or the next day.  It just seems like he goes off about the most ridiculous things then they are magically all my fault.  Just because you love someone doesn’t mean it will work out.  I do love him more than I’m sure he knows.  But how long do I get kicked around…and stick around?  I didn’t call anyone to tell anyone this time because I’m embarassed every time I get a place to stay lined up..then I let him back.

Life is sucking hardcore right now.  I’m mostly sad about what this is doing to my 6 yr old son.  Life’s hard enough without your parents not getting along.  All he wanted to do was go paint so bad and we didn’t even do that because his dad just kept harping. 

At least I went to the gym even though it was followed by 2 glasses of wine.  Wish me luck!

I’m not doing too bad.  Not loosing really.  Or I guess I’m re-losing the same pounds over and over and over.  I’m back down to 210 flat.  I dont know how.  Last week I ate everything I could get my hands on.  Ok so I shouldn’t admit this….but hubby bought one of those big cans of deluxe nuts (no peanuts in the jar) and I nearly polished it off in 5 days.  Yep but finally I realized what I was doing and I haven’t touched it since….well not like there was much left anyway.  Hubby asked for the can the other night and nearly flipped out.  I ate 24 chocolate chip cookies last week.  I had a few Venti starbucks white chocolate mochas.  We ate out too much.  I was a BAD BAD GIRL!!!  So, I’m super shocked to still have lost. 

Ok…so I workout every day.  This past Saturday Hubby went with me and we ran a lot of intervals and I did a bunch of arm lifting on the Free Motion machines.  WHOLY COW!!!  I haven’t been able to get myself sore in so long.  Well that worked!  All the running really made my hamstrings sore too. 
All the girls left this morning after the treadmill and I stayed.  Did abs and then did the bike for 20 minutes so I could read my book.  I’ve ate super good so far today.  I had my usual slimfast and Light Thomasvill eng muffin.  Lunch was a Lean Cuisine at 280 cals.  I stopped for a PLAIN regular black coffee at starbucks I did add a Tbsp of creamer when I got home so that was 35 cals with a splenda too.  Snack i cut off a few pieces of cheese to eat in the car on the way to take kiddo to karate.  Been drinking water.  I think I’m going to have a lean cuisine for dinner too.  I do have to say I’m STARVING!!!

The mad rush to drop a few pounds….PICTURES!!!  We’ve as a family never taken a REAL family photo.  I made an appt for this Sunday at Portrait Innovations.  I’ve spent a small fortune on outfits so far.  I actually went to tan today.  It’s been a month since I went last.  I’ll probably go a few times this week just to not look like a “snowflake.”  (Stole that from Blindside)

I saw FOUR movies this week.  I’m not a movie goer but some how saw my yearly amount in ONE WEEK!  Saw A Christmas Carol, Blindside, New Moon, and Planet 51.  I liked the first three.  Planet 51 sucked and I got in a 30 minute nap.  I’m one of those that cant even sleep when the tv is on so that tells you how bad it was.  Blindside was AMAZING!  I didn’t even want to go but the girls wanted me to so I did.  TOTALLY great!  New Moon was pretty good.  Wayyyyyy better than Twilight.  And it really captured the connection between Bella and Jacob.  I was never team Jacob but this movie makes me second guess myself.  Oh btw….I had lots of popcorn at 3 of those movies too…oopps!

OMG imagine where I’d be on the scale if I could keep my mouth shut and not inhale all that food!

I’m going to do better!  I’m not going to gain any Christmas weight either.  We are traveling to my sisters for Christmas but only going to be there 2 nights.  Not too much time to sit around and eat.  I just have to keep busy and not give myself idle time.  Maybe I should blog more!  Bright Idea! 

Ok…gonna go do a few chores and then eat dinner and cozy up in bed and read or something.  Hubby is out of town this week so it’s pretty quiet.  Hope you are all doing great and zipping those food inhalers shut tight!

I’m doing good.  I’ve been to the gym 3 days in a row now.  I skipped Monday because we got back from my Mom’s house on Sunday night and I was EXHAUSTED!  I feel good and feel like I’m making pretty good choices.  I’m determined right now.  I want to break past 210 and move on to 205.  Not asking for huge results…just results period.  I’ve been stuck in this weight range for toooooo long.  I keep thinking I need to start adding an evening workout, but damn I feel so tuckered out as it is.   Hubby’s been going out of town for the weeks again so I’m extra busy.  I’ve got so much on my plate and cant get it all done.

There’s a woman at school who I thought was a good friend of mine, but I guess not.  She’s a perfectionist and expects everyone else to be too.  She’s constantly checking up on me and makes her disgust known at my lack of progress.  I’m doing the yearbook and in charge of box tops plus the many other things that are thrown at me!  Give me a freakin break.  Plus I’m room mom for our class but the teacher is insistant that it’s another mom that’s in charge of the class Christmas party, WHATEVER.  So that particular woman is mad that I’m not telling that teacher how it is and what’s going to take place.  But my son’s teacher is a hard ass!  and she does what she wants when she wants.  So, step aside I SHALL!

Just been in an irritated mood since yesterday.  Sometimes you feel like your best is never good enough.  SCREW EM!

I’m going to eat my breakfast and get showered.  I’ve got to run a few errands and pick up lunch for Cole.  He wanted McDonalds today at school.  It’s Christmas lunch and most parents bring outside food in cos the lunches are pretty funky!

Hope you are having a great week and keeping a happy face! 

Soooo…I did have a big ole burger and fries from McD’s yesterday, but I guess I needed it.  I dipped just below 210 today.  I’m going to try to get my big booty outta bed early tomorrow and go to the gym and get showered before the boys get up.  We’ll see how well that goes! 

I’m trying not to get stressed out.  I always do when we travel.  I have to pack everything and the kitchen sink.  In-laws came over yesterday and I was so irritated and pissed.  Why do you go to someones house when they say they are busy and need to pack.  What a pain.  Then they get pissed because we dont pay any attention to them.  WHATEVER!  Oh Lord, I’m so thankful to be outta this place for Thanksgiving.

I’m getting little worried about the eating.  My Mom’s telling me all about what’s going to be there.  She wasn’t even going to cook but I insisted.  I missed her cooking last year and was literally in tears.  I did pretty good last year though thru the holidays.  I only gained 2 pounds I think.  Year before was 7!  I told hubby that he better  slap my hand!  We will be busy doing a garage sale so hopefully that will aid in the CONTROL I’m going to have!

I was able to get on a pair of SMALL 16s that I bought probably 2 months ago and hadn’t been able to fit into them yet.  They aren’t totally comfy (not too bad) and got a nice muffin top but I figured I could break them in! 

I will be checking in while I’m away.  I hope you all have a great holiday with lots to be thankful for.  And PUT THE FORK DOWN!!!!  and STEP AWAY FROM THE TABLE!!  QUICK!!!

I do have to say that Fiber One cereal really cleaned me out this morning.  I know…TMI.  I went to the gym and did 45 minutes on the treadmill.  ( I went Saturday too and ran for 1.25 miles and walked the rest.)  But lately my lungs have just been killing me.  Any of you runners have that problem?  What’s wrong and how do I fix it?  I came home had breakfast.  I got on my hands and knees and scrubbed my carpets with a dry cleaning compound.  So that was a work out in itself!  I then started to work on raking leaves in the front yard, but people kept stopping by to chat with me.  People I dont know but live in the neighborhood.  Didn’t get too much done - only a couple trash cans full.  I then came in to vacuum up the carpet stuff bc it had to sit for 2 hours.  Then took a shower and got ready.  Didn’t have time for lunch so just had a handful of blackberries and a cheese stick.  Snack was a few pistachios.  Dinner I made a La Tortilla wrap with turkey meat, pepper jack cheese, lettuce, red onion, and then had some celery and bell pepper to snack on with it.  OK OK A few baked lays too….not too many though.  Oh and I better fess up.  Probably had 3 things of snack sized halloween candy.  It may be the death of me.  CHOCOLATE!!! 

I got so much done today again.  I’m feeling very good about it.  Hubby and I also got lots of chores done Sunday morning so that was nice for a change.

OHHHH… took kiddo to his fall festival at the karate school on Friday night.  Him and some other boys, all about 4-6 years old, were rough housing and Cole managed to hit his face on another boy’s head and his face was just gushing blood.  I couldnt tell where from I thought it was his lip.  Well…long story short….it was his 2 front teeth…one of which was very loose.  The head of the karate school came in and said he would pull them.  Cole was terrified (he’s lost 2 teeth, but he doesn’t like to even wiggle them) .  He had the first one out before Cole even knew what was going on.  The second one he’s like “it’s not really loose but it’s bleeding real bad you want me to just take it too?”  I said it’s what he thought was best and cole said it was ok…Well that’s what he thought till he was screaming that it hurt.  But Mr. Liles got it out quick.  So, at a halloween party my 6 yr old lost his 2 front teeth!  It’s so bizarre to see them gone.  He looks like a little old man who forgot to put his teeth in! 

Went to hubby’s step-great grandma’s 100th bday party on Saturday out of town.  Got to see lots of people I dont really know!  But they all remember me and flock to talk to me.  They are the sweetest people and always make you feel special.  There was a little down syndrome girl there and she latched on to me at one point.  I was sitting on the floor playing with my 2 year old niece and she just sat next to me and petted my hair.  I asked if she was going trick or treating and she said yes but she’d go with me.  It was pretty funny.  You either love me or you hate me I guess!

Oh so I guess I should post my Monday weigh in weight.  It was a flat 208.  2 mondays ago I was 212.8 and last monday I was 215.8.  So…big difference either way really.  Not sure about that 215+  I know it was TOM and I was sick and had a yeast infection…I was really a total wreck.  OH well I wont try to over analize it anymore, but whatever I’m doing…it’s working! 

SW=225  CW = 208  I never really make goals..I just see where I make it.  But mini goals are probably 205 (20lbs lost), 199 (which I cant even imagine at this point), and 182 (just seems like a number I used to always get stuck at.  I’d say my ultimate goal is to be a size 12.  I’d love to be smaller, but I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.  Hell…208 is the lowest I’ve been in probably since shortly after having my son.  But then count the 9-10 months before that.  So probably 7 years. 

Here’s to a good rest of the week and hope you guys are kicking it up a notch too!!!

*update* I forgot to say I drank probably 3/4 of a bottle of Riesling wine yesterday…oops!

Day was pretty good.  Ate mainly low-carb - which really doesn’t do me much good.  I’m more grouchy and need some carbs!  But didn’t do it on purpose…low carb was handy.  Had a cheese stick for a snack about 1.  Lunch I stopped at a local mex food place and just got a 4oz container with some chicken fajita meat in it.  Then for dinner hubby suggested going to mcd’s or wendy’s or something of the sort and I finally said…lets just eat at home.  Saved us $25 (max) and me a ton of calories!  I had a La Tortilla wrap with 2 scrambled eggs, 2 slices of shaved turkey lunch meat chopped up and about 2 tbsps of shred cheese.  I’ll be so glad I made the right choice tomorrow.  But dangit didn’t french fries sound delish! 

So I weighed for the 3rd time before I left to run errands at 1pm and went from 210.6 before breakfast to 209.6.  Which is what I was before I got sick at the beginning of the month.  I’ll be happy to be the same tomorrow and just maintain. 

Friday mornings hubby always go to breakfast at this local place (we are there regularly and were even on their last commercial).  I told hubby today that we were NOT going to breakfast tomorrow and we were going to the gym.  Well…turns out he’s got to go to work instead anyway.  So, for sure no breakfast out and I’m GOING to the gym. 

Not sure what’s happened but it’s just clicking again.  I guess I’m finally over being sick and getting my energy back.  I just know those times when it doesn’t click and you just wonder and worry over why it’s not and why you have no motivation.  So I’m taking this and RUNNING for as long as it lasts! 

Once again…thanks for the support ladies and I think I’ll start posting in the mornings when all your brains are nice and fresh!  Have a super evening…NO CHEATING!  Eat an apple!

I wrote yesterday that my weight was 212.4.  Well I weighed later after lunch at about 1pm and saw 211.  So I weighed this morning first thing and saw 210.6….then I weighed at my normal time..drum roll……209.6!  Which is what I weighed at the beginning of the month (I’d seen 208.8 too but that was a fluke I think.) . 

Anyways…I had a great OP day yesterday.  I made turkey burgers with orrowheat sandwhich thins for the buns and some crumbs from the baked bbq lays bag.  Lots of water.  I was super proud of myself.  I also had an apple before bed.  I’ve been doing that for about the last week.  I’ve found an apple called a Jonagold.  It’s a very small reddish colored apple.  I’ve had more apples in the last week than I have in a few years combined.  This morning before the gym I had one tsp of peanut butter.  It actually worked to keep my hunger pains curbed. 

I’ve got a few things to do around here, take a shower, and need to go to walmart for more halloween candy for kiddo’s karate fall festival and some groceries. 

Had some gossip/drama going on with an ex-bff.  Her hubby went missing last week.  She filed a missing persons report and hadn’t heard from him besides an email that was similar to a suicide note.  Well, while at the gym this morning a friend said hey isn’t that “so n so” on the tv.  Yep sure was.  Missing person, described what he was wearing when last seen and what to do if you know anything.  So, I call her to tell her he’s on the morning news.  Well apparently he called her yesterday, he’d been living on the streets in Las Vegas ( we live in TEXAS!).  Her father bought him a plane ticket home and they took him to the mental hospital here.  Don’t know more details than that, but it was such a freaky feeling to see someone you know on the news as a missing person.  I think he had a mental breakdown or something basically.  I just couldn’t imagine.  They have 3 kids (12, 6, 1 ages).  All girls.  The oldest is a bit emotional anyways so I’m sure this has just wrecked her.    So many questions!  I’m sure she’s got plenty herself. 

Ok…sooo thankful for my uneventful life at this point!  Thank you God!  Ok gonna get off my hiney and get movin. 

PS….I read lots of blogs this morning.  It’s nice to see majority of you in a good mood and being successful and even if you aren’t successful…you are HOPEFUL!  We can do it girls!

So…weight crept all the way up into the high 215’s.  Gotta admit I was freaking out.  Granted last week was TOM also.  Yesterday and Today were both 212.4.  Shocking really because I’ve been snacking like CRAZY!!  I’ve got to get it under control.  Stupidly I let my son bring home Cosmic Fudge Brownies for the first time EVER… Well…I’ve had 3 packages and he’s had 1.  Never letting those in the house again.  Anyways…I’ve got like 3 more pounds to go to get back to the pre-sickness weight.  I had gotten to where my pants were painful to wear they were so tight.  Just in the  3 or so pounds I’ve dropped since last week they are comfy again.  Whew!  I did not want to go back up to my size 18s.  I worked all damn summer to get into those 16s.

This week is crazy (for everyone I’m sure).  We have karate today, Cole needs a haircut desperately, I need to get to the publisher and get contracts signed (I’m doing the school yearbook), Sonic drinks for my sons class on Friday for winning their Box Tops contest (which I’m also in charge of), pass out goodie bags I made, make choco pretzel sticks cos they were a huge hit and many friends got their feelings hurt over not getting enough, karate party friday night, and going out of town Saturday for my hubby’s Step-great grandma’s 100th bday.  Party is stupidly on Halloween so not sure if we will make it back in time for good trick or treating.

I’m exhausted just thinking about it.  Well, gonna go shower and try to get a few more things done.  I’ve come home from the gym and napped for about 3 hrs each day this week.  NOT TODAY!!  I’ve tried to get some stuff done.  I’m so sleepy but I’m going to fight it!! 

I hope you guys are all on track and doing what it takes to keep me motivated!  HA so selfish!  Have a super day/week!