saturday morning and it’s cloudy outside :)
Yep, after spending my Friday night doing Word Search while propped in my bed - I emerge to a dirty house 
Yep, that single girl’s lifestyle is truly one to envy.
But let me say this: I have lost 3 pounds.
Where are the Mariachi bands when you need them?
Your fluffy puff of a gal is now 189. Yep. The muffin top has deflated a tiny bit and is now not leaving that red ring of joy around my non existent waist.
So having done the slimshit barely this week - I feel a sense of well —— empowerment? I am nearly out so I must go to the store and buy another case of liquid miracle to supplement my intake. I’m going back to work on Monday so it shouldn’t be difficult to torture myself in that controlled environment.
Co-Dependent has been calling - she wants to hang out. Just a sweetie that one is but alas - I have the Crisis Couple to meet today for lunch and ‘Burn After Reading’. I opened one of my credit card statements and found a bonus of an 83 dollar credit so that will be paying for today’s festivities as I do need to thank them for the Tahoe trip as well as Ms. Crisis birthday which I sorely forgot a few weeks ago. I totally suck. I only this year found out Shopaholic’s birthday - I’ve been fucking it up for the past 7 years. Negligent bitch I know.
On the topic of finances. WTF?! I need to figure out where I’m fucking up. I haven’t bought a goddamn thing for months now and yet I managed to overdraft?! I think it’s those concert tickets. They were costly as well as the tickets to go see Toni Morrison lecture. Worthy things but honestly I need to re-evaluate my spending because I can’t afford to fuck up like that when I get a mortgage.
Dang.
So yesterday me and my new agent went to see a flurry of houses in 2 1/2 hours. Loved it. Ms. Z so kindly offered a listing that was magnificent! You never know where the magic will come from on any given day and that was just wonderful! The East Bay is so adventurous - affordability also has unpredictability built into it so one street can be decent and the next treacherous. It’s a shame what solid houses are on these rough streets. A crying shame actually. I saw a very quirky house on a totally bad feng shui lot - T intersection, stop sign in front of the property, freeway to the right and busy busy street to the back. But it made us both smile when we opened that front door. A giant bright hardwood rectangle with 3 skylights built on the roof - you could see clear to the back wall which was kitchen cabinets. I love a giant space I only like walls on bathrooms and bedrooms. The place needed some work but it was very cool. The location however was a goddamn disaster. Oh well, that’s the way it’s been lately. Great houses in bad locations. Total crap houses everywhere. You just never know. So the search continues.
My agent is funny and chatty - she got the gastric band surgery 10 years ago and met her latest husband online. She disclosed this when she offered me potato chips while she was sipping her Diet Coke. I declined while sipping my Splenda Starbucks frap from the 7-11 we stopped in. She said it was the best thing she’s ever done and she never looks at a scale anymore. She used to weigh 275 - how incredible no? She says her life started over again after the surgery. She’s gonna preview houses for me that I send to her so I wouldn’t have to make the trip if it’s not worth seeing. That was cool of her.
It was weird when I thought about her food choices last night while I was sitting here. I wasn’t hungry really yet I insisted on feeding myself because God forbid I not have a meal for once. I forced myself to eat and it was sheerly out of habit rather than need. I could have stopped but I didn’t. I guess I need to really listen to my body instead of following habit. That’s a change that also needs to come you know? It’s like a series of mental challenges - choices, quantity, quality, hunger? I know that habit shit can really fuck you up. I had an co-worker that had the surgery and she would continue to order huge quantities of food when we went out because she was so used to it. Without that mindfulness you can really undo your most earnest efforts. It’s not so much self control as it is logical thinking you know? Shit, I even doubted this while I typed it… whatever it is you need to be aware of it. So no more forcing myself to eat. Ridiculous.
Well I have to confess that I signed back onto e-ugly. I had three bites and what’s a girl to do? The prospect of perhaps sitting across the table from someone more interesting that my discolored Word Search booklet was intriguing to say the least. So if nothing else, I’ll have a story to tell right? So one of them I haven’t heard from - but the other two are going strong. One is a 49 year old Finance guy with a son and the other is a 52 year old Architect. So we’ll see as Financier has already left me a voicemail message that I’ll respond to today and I e-mailed Architect my phone number yesterday. Oh well - no GREAT EXPECTATIONS believe me. At this point, I think everyone is aware of my luck with men.
I managed to come to another life changing decision while at the Lake. I’ve decided to get my clinical license BEFORE going into any child rearing situation. My ex-husband helped me come to that conclusion when he said I was insane to not ensure that I was at my financial best before bringing a kid into the picture. He’s right - but let’s pretend that I came to this after all I am the one who was smarter RIGHT?! So that’s the new deal which means miserable class taking and test taking again. 
So be prepared to hear the whining that goes along with that endeavor. Yep, like this isn’t the WHINE, PISS, MOAN and BITCH blog of the century.
Hopefully it might also include a SEX foray at some point in the near future? Yes, I vaguely remember what that was like…. 
Ok, I need to do something about this goddamn mess and it’s already 9:16am. Fuck. I invited Harriet over to hang tonight if she was available….she also gave me a listing She’s so sweet - especially after all she’s been through walking away from her house as well. Can’t put my buddy through a dirty house can I?
So up and at it.
Oh yeah, today’s Tarot card says:
The Empress card affirms that my alter ego today is a Domestic Diva, whose superpower is to conceive, nurture or create potential by labors of love.
WTF?! Diva yes. Domestic - well somebody out to look at this dump right now.
Guess I’d better create a potentially clean house through some labor of love right now.
fuck.
Posted by anngirl on September 20th, 2008 under General3 Responses to “saturday morning and it’s cloudy outside :)”
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September 20th, 2008 at 2:28 pm
Sounds like you might have a winner in that realtor, Ann! I hope so.
Congratulations of the weight loss!
September 20th, 2008 at 6:47 pm
How great that you have found a real estate agent who makes sense and makes an effort. It sucks that the great houses are in the crap locations.
I am inspired to read the estae agent’s comment about how having the lap band was the best thing she ever did for herself. As you say, You never know where the magic will come from on any given day
September 20th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
Fingers crossed that the online guys will be better this time around.
Congrats on the weight AND the new real estate woman.