Two of Swords
I neglected to mention that yesterday one of my former co-workers Stinker (now that’s a really ‘nice’ name for her) happened to say that she got married as of last November. Now, she’s the chick that I went out with to a ’singles mixer’ along with WildChild and Harriet (social worker at the hospital) early last year. So at that time, she wanted to come along because she wanted to support my effort to get out there and meet someone. She had a boyfriend (5 months) and talked about getting married to him. When we got to the lounge, she took the last ‘ice breaker’ thingie and laughed it off as she ran around the room trying to fit her ‘lock’ into that elusive ‘key’. Mind you, I walked in last and there were no ice breakers left for me! Then when the only decent guy in the room came up to speak to all of us, she started in flirting really really hard. Dude walked away saying that he would be back to hang with us again. Now she went to the bar to get a drink and Harriet asked me if I was interested in the guy so she could have him sit next to me on the u-shaped sofa. Stinker came back with her drink and heard our conversation. She said, ‘Annie - you like him?’ I told her I’d try to talk to him when he got back. Wildchild asked me to go to the restroom and once out of earshot she asked me how serious she was with her boyfriend because WTF was up with her flirting? Next thing you know, we get back and Harriet looked pissed! She whispered to me, ‘I told her what I was going to do and as soon as he came back she invited him to sit next to her!’ There was Stinker flipping her long hair, leaning into him with her hand on his leg repeating, ‘I’m FEISTY! I am SO FEISTY!’ while giggling wildly. At that point I wondered if she would unzip his pants with her teeth then I wanted to BREAK HER NECK! I really wanted to ask her in front of him ‘SO WHAT ABOUT YOUR BOYFRIEND?! WHAT WOULD THAT POOR SAP THINK OF YOU BEING SO FEISTY?!’ Wildchild saw my face and said, ‘Girl, it’s so not worth it - just let it be, let’s go!’ So we all came together in my car and after making us wait for 10 minutes, her pug face came scampering out tottering on her high heels with his number in her hand. I was aghast! So I called her ass out and asked her why she was acting so crazy when she had a boyfriend AND knew I was interested in that punk?! She said that she was just meeting a new friend and somewhere down the line said, ‘You just don’t know how to get a man!’ I wanted to KICK HER cheap ass high heeled ASS to HELL while I told her that she was acting like a SKANK at the lounge! After a few minutes in the car, tempers cooled down and she apologized to me. We ended up at jazz club afterwards where I decided to just let it go and was friendly to her for the rest of the evening.
To be quite frank - I have never let it go. After that night, despite her apologies and her explaining that her insensitivity was due to her lack of female friends - I never wanted to be her friend again. Polite conversation, but no more hanging out. She was hurt by it I know, but then again so was I and I didn’t want someone like her around me. She didn’t act like any friend I have ever had before - she said she didn’t know how to act around girls because she just never had any female friends. She prefers males. RIDICULOUS.
I think there’s something horribly wrong with a woman who can’t stand the company of other women. If it weren’t for all my girlfriends (which include all of you!), I don’t know where I would be today - we are each other’s keepers.
Anyway, you’re probably wondering why I went into this torrid tale but today my tarot card was two of swords - suspending judgment, making peace, a choice made, a good time to resolve any outstanding differences. An end to pain (physically and emotionally), end to quarrels.
Yeah. Time to let go.
It’s one thing to be snubbed by an asshole guy - it’s another to have your girlfriend put you under the bus. I haven’t seen her in ages and yet it felt like yesterday when I saw her again. I congratulated her on her marriage and she even feigned interest in helping me locate some paperwork for my license. Who knows if it’ll ever materialize - but I hope that by sharing this with y’all I can let that stone in my heart drop.
I drove a total of 4 hours today to see a client and didn’t use the heat because I was afraid I’d run out of gas on a natural gas car. I froze my ass off on that long ass cold rainy drive and thought about how it was punishment for talkin’ shit about her after she left yesterday. (a tiny group of me, wildchild & baby mama) Tonight in art class, I just couldn’t do that gesture drawing shit and felt like a loser. Again, I attribute this to me talkin’ shit….
Hell, I suck for talkin’ shit and still having hurt/angry feelings over something so trivial in the grand scheme of things.
Time for sage and deep breathing.
Posted by anngirl on January 25th, 2008 under General| M | T | W | T | F | S | S |
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January 25th, 2008 at 7:44 am
You are not wrong! She was abominable! That is no way to behave. But as you said, better let it go. She is so not worth it.
Sending love and good vibes,
iniya
January 25th, 2008 at 7:46 am
I have a few “friends” that I have felt like that over the years. I guess it is healthier to let it go, but it is very very hard to do. Just be thankful that is her life, and not yours! she has to be a very lonely person on the inside.
I sure have missed your blog. I just read the last few entries. Sounds like your life is just as crazy as always. xoxox I gotta say I MISS California. I never considered myself a CA girl even though I was born in Pasadena, but now that I am unable to go at least every few months, I sure miss it!
January 25th, 2008 at 11:13 am
Oh, ack! Your “friend” is disturbed. Really. You’ve got enough clients, m’dear - you don’t NEED disturbed friends, as well. That whole situation sounds just wretched. I’d put that right smack at the top of my “never again” list if I were you. Pick another card. The seeress has spoken.
Love ya, kiddo
Z
January 25th, 2008 at 10:35 pm
May I be blunt? Your “friend” is a b*tch. That was a sl*tty, b*tchy, selfish thing for her to do. You are most certainly better off without her. And for the record. For years I had more guy friends then girl friends, but that did not turn me into a stupid, snotty, self centered, wh*re. She wanted to be center stage and didn’t care who she had to step on to get there. You deserve better baby! Love ya!
January 25th, 2008 at 10:39 pm
Oh yeah, I have to say this too. Anyone can find a man if you lay down and throw your legs up in the air, which basically is what she did. “I’m Feisty!” Yuck! It just makes me want to punch her in the face. Sorry, but I think we all have met women like that and i still wanna punch them! LOL! Okay I will stop now…