I don’t know why I’m so surly today, but I can’t help it.  I had a bad food day, but did exercise, very strenuously.  I think the situps are actually starting to show a little bit on my so-far-still-hideous belly, so that’s encouraging, but I just can’t stop obsessing about losing weight faster, better, etc.  I need to just get over it and stay the course.  This is exactly what I hate about the dieting thing- it’s like a partial lobotomy so that all a normally sane and savvy girl can think about is dialing the weight loss routine up a notch.  This is one of the greatest thing about this blogging thing- it’s a semi-anonymous format to air my anxieties related to this specific topic.  Anyhow, today was not great- a disappointing showing after my good behavior at the dinner party.  Worse than usual bad day because it involved actual CANDY, not just extra regular food.  The damn leftover chocolate, and some delicious bread from the party.  Food breakdown:  since this morning, I’ve eaten two tomatoes, two slices of bread with margarine, a large salad (with chicken breast, feta, mixed greens and spinach, carrots, radishes, olives, lite balsamic vinaigrette), 15 squares of chocolate (if I were obsessively counting calories, I would freak out that I had consumed an extra fucking 600 of them from the chocolate, not to mention all the empty carbs and calories of the bread and butter- but since I am technically not, I’m not going to completely lose my shit). If all that weren’t enough, I also, for dinner, had a sandwich: two slices rye, lite mayo, chicken, gouda, tomatoes.  I feel pretty psychologically dirty, but not at all full.  I could easily eat another fifteen squares of chocolate and all the remaining food in the fridge, but I swear I am tapped the fuck out for the day.  No more.  I’m going to a midnight showing of the new Indiana Jones tonight (huzzah!) and when I pick up my friend, I’m going to deposit the rest of the bag of temptation, fancypants chocolate at her house so it won’t drive me to distraction again.  Feh, I must be pre-menstrual or something.