Well it was after 2 am before I got any sleep. Bf is leaving the weekend and he’s a little edgy. I got a call last night from my Grandmother saying that my ‘father’..if i can call him that..is here visiting..she was wondering if I was going home for Thanksgiving. NO and thank god for that…anyways I was stressed out and we (bf and I) were arguing all night…

I’ve only seen my father ONCE since I was about 13 yrs old. He lived with us up until then..used to drink and of course take it out on my mother..now let me add that my mother has red hair and is full of spite as well. Anyways he left NL and moved to Alberta and has only returned twice since…….once when my Grandfather was ill and now. What makes it so hard is that I’m extremely close to my grandparents..his parents. At the beginning my aunts would buy me presents and write “Love Dad” on them…yes perhaps he sent them the $$ for them but I honestly think they were just trying to compensate for them. So my grandmother said last night..oh perhaps you’ll get to talk to him on the phone before he goes back. I literally felt like screaming at her! I’ve literally spoken to him probably 5 whole times in 14 years! I hate that she has to try to make us close. A part of me hates him for not trying…for not being the father he should have. My grandmother is 80 years old..a heart of gold….so as much as I’d like to say something I hold it all in.

This is probably the most ‘private’ blog I’ve written on here..but in a way it’s like a diary..lol

Ohh..on a good note, the scale this AM read 144-145..thank god for that…off to work and a meeting after..Yay :-(.

Angela

They had chicken breast ( bone in) on sale the other day..so today I put then entire pack in the oven (4). I am also cooking potatoes, fresh corn from a local farm, mini carrots and steamed broccoli. I may also make gravy and a Uncle Ben’s Stuff N Such Dressing, lol. I thought I should cook something if bf is leaving next Sunday so we won’t get to have much of a dinner lol.

My boyfriend has a friend that he has kinda taken under his wing. He has a poor family life, doesn’t work and a lot of medical issues. We have never invited him over for dinner but I thought today we should. He’s here now and I just discovered he has major gall bladder/pickiness issues and can only eat some of what I cooked…oh well..I’m glad he will get to eat SOMETHING! lol.

Aquafit is tonight and my fave instructor, Mary is filling in..whoo hoo..I invited my bf but she always makes some excuse to why she can’t go..yet she always says..I should go with you sometime. Oh well………I will go alone and that won’t stop me..lol.

Have a great day!

Angela

10:23pm- Before my Aquafit class from 7:45-8:45 I had major chocolate/sweet cravings…my first thought is well I’ll work my butt off in the pool and can get a cookie later. I tell you, I did work really hard..hard enough that Mary pointed me out to the rest of the class..AGAIN…i’m like her physical guinea pig i swear…keeps pushing me….well I kept at it until I got a major major stitch and had to slow it down. It was 3 hours after eating so I have no idea how I got one. ANyways on the way home…bf dropped me off and picked me up..he asks..”hey do you want to get a cookie at Tim Horton’s??” A part of me was screaming “YESSS” then another part of me..i swear I have voices inside my head, said ” DO YOU REALLY WANT TO LOSE THAT LAST 5 LBS??? iF SO ..DON’T EAT A DAMN COOKIE”…so I declined…came home…got a weight watcher whole wheat wrap..spread light PB on it and sliced a banana…sooo goooooooood…with a cup of tea my sugar craving was gone..VOILA…i’m really proud of me..because in the last few mths I would’ve given in…but not tonight..whoo hoo! Okay the voices upstairs are both telling me it’s time for bed..Good night!

Oh I love the weekends so much….you can’t even possibly know how much! I teach 3 and 4 yr olds all week and by Friday I’m about ready to pull my hair out. I love them so much but I’m SO glad I can give them back at the end of the day. LOL. I’ve come to realize that working in childcare is the absolute best birth control you could ever ask for..seriously folks….

Sinuses/allergies are doing MUCH better. I had a massage this AM and the therapist did a lot of massages for my neck and the shoulder that was bothering me. Actually my other shoulder is tender now..perhaps from the massage itself. She told me to keep a lot of heat on it..thank god for my Magic Bag!

I set my alarm this AM for 7….intending to go to 2 hour zumba challenge class at my gym ( first Saturday of each month) but I couldn’t get out of bed to save my life. I was just sooooooo tired. I think it should be illegal to require people to get out of bed that early on a Saturday for ANYTHING. I got in bed last night….couldn’t sleep at all..was too warm..bf was talking ( something he does a lot of lately when i’m going to sleep…such a pain in the ass!) It was approx 2 am when I finally got to sleep.

Bf’s flight is booked to go away next Sunday..Thanksgiving weekend..long weekend..woot….but I have to stay in the city to see him off. He will probably be gone at least til Xmas or after. His company is NOT paying for flights to/from Alberta and Newfoundland…and he is off for 4 days every 10 days…not much point to spend so much $ flying across the country for a few days. I am going to use this time to get back on track with my eating..thank god..good bye to frozen fries/ chicken nuggets/pizzas etc..all the junk he loves and my exercise.

Two of my gf’s are getting together for drinks tonight and probably going out somewhere…I could go too..but honestly sometimes that gets a little old for me..A) I ‘m the only one NOT single and they’re on the man prawl/hunt and sometimes I feel like the odd one in the bunch B) I usualy get bf to drop us off downtown and/or pick us up…(it’s $25 cab ride each way) and he knows we’re safe once we’re picked up…and my best friend has often almost declined or told me to not get him to do this…WHY I have no idea?? save $$ and get a ride home..not wait an hr in the cold for a cab….I almost wonders IF its because she wants to meet someone down there..etc…and if bf picks us up she can’t really do that…hmm..

Anyways think I’m gonna stay home and relax..bf leaves next weekend..our anniversary was Thursday past and I had a meeting for work and then shopping at Old Navy ( got two exact shirts, different colour for 3.99 each on clearance..wicked!)  with a friend. He’s still not feeling well and I honestly just want to spend time w/ him before he goes. I kind of hate that my two closest friends don’t have a bf. They don’t know what its like to be kind dedicated to someone else besides themselves.

Anyways i’m off.

Ang

Weight this Am was still 146.5 :-(. I really liked being 142……….

I’ve always had major sinus issues and allergies…well for the past 4-5 years. Allergies have been acting up a lot lately but wondering now if i’m developing some sort of sinus infection or cold. Major sinus pain going on and runny nose. EVEN after I take allergy pills i still have a runny nose..grosssss. I feel like I’ve been hit in the nose/face by a baseball…lol…ok so not really that funny.

I’ve worked out at the gym for the past 3 days. I got off work today at 5:30 and picked up bf and got groceries. By the time I got home it was quarter to seven and I still hadn’t had supper..which ended up being a caesar salad and a whole wheat croissant…not much at all. I didn’t go to the gym tonight…just needed a break and like i said..i feel like crapppppppp…Probably the weather too..all rainy/drizzly :S..grosssssssss!

Gnite chicks!

Angela

Ok folks..I have a problem..Just realized today what an obsession/addiction I have with chocolate…I always have had one but it’s getting out of control! Let’s be honest here..today I’ve eaten TWO 100 cal chocolate bars and an entire box of chocolate covered almonds ( a coworker was selling them for her daughter) and a few chocolate macaroons. This is nuts! I kept saying to myself “oh i’m going to Aquafit tonight and the instructor is the best..she always works me so hard so I can have the chocolate” Ya ………….how stupid..a FEW chocolates but no I had to go insane with it all.

Anyways, came home from work ate supper and then took a little nap..woke up 730..had to scramble to get ready for the gym..I had the Crazy fit vibration machine booked for 745 and Aquafit began at 8. I’m approx 7 minutes from my gym so I didn’t have much time and didn’t make it to the vibration machine..oh well.

I did bust my butt in the pool..Kind of proud to say that Mary, the instructor ALWAYS points out to the class how much I’m pushing myself..or how red in the face I am..or how much I love cardio. Sometimes it’s embaressing but oh well it feels good. Sometimes I can feel her watching me as if I’m her guinea pig and she’s testing me to push myself further. A few weeks ago a girl in the changeroom asked me if I was the class instructor…lol. Perhaps because I was wearing a Speedo suit or because she was new…Then I thought..hmm…do I look ‘fit’?? or like I could be an instructor??

Ok so I am in love with Autumn. I’ve started decorating my classroom already with Fall and Halloween decorations. I also painted pumpkins on my window and a huge tree with different colors of leaves on it..some falling and some on the ‘ground’. The kids were so excited. I also brought out some red/brown and orange construction paper and the children got to collect leaves and sort them on the sheets of paper and then stick them on…I then put the leaves in our science area.

Alrighty I’m beat to a snot…off to bed for me!

It’s 835Am and i’m awake and all ready to go to Zumba at 9…so proud..so much of me wanted to stay in bed and sleep the morning away..lol.

Weight this AM was 146..thank god..it’s going down lol.

Bf wanted to go out to a fish and chips restaurant last night..i didn’t have anything deep fried but settled on a BLT sandwich.

May write more later..out the door I go!

Pretty bad when I look forward to Thursday….so I can say..”Yay, tomorrow is Friday!”

I slept SOOOO good last night it’s unbelievable. I didn’t even hear bf get home and into bed…which is very unusual….the SLIGHTEST sounds wakes me up. I think it’s because I took my allergy medicine before bed..knocked me out cold..whoo hoo….think I might stick to it.

Thanks Vicki for commenting on yesterday’s blog and cheering me up a little. All of my clothes DOES fit..except that my pants..size 4 are a little snug..and I don’t feel that comfortable anymore…I’ve noticed that my size 8’s are not as loose. Oh well..I know I work my butt off with exercise and that I am gaining a lot more muscle…that is the main thing.

Weight this AM kept going between 147.5 and 148. I can’t expect my weight to stay on the same number forever..impossible…and I cannot obsess about it and let it ruin my day. It’s also not that healthy to weigh myself EVERY morning to look for a change. Should go back to just the Friday AM’s.

Bf wanted takeout for supper…and I refused..Yay..going to Zumba in less than an hour and I ate enough junk last week….and am paying for it. He’s gone to get it for himself…perhaps KFC or some garbage. I’ll go workout and eat something later.

Toodles Noodles!

Angela

I’m lost….a year ago i weighed less than what i do now. Woke up this AM..weight was 149. This honestly brings my whole day down and I feel gross and like I am letting myself go.

I had a 2 hour workout on Sunday and honestly the best workout I’ve had in a long time last night. Aquafit taught by my fave instructor Mary ( in case some of you didn’t read my older blogs…Mary is 63…the body of a 25 yr old..i swear to god..and the most motivating, up beat person you could honestly meet..her class is like watching a comedy show..lol). Anyways by the end of the class I was almost shaking..exhilerating.

I know my eating isn’t the greatest but I don’t think its THAT bad..now one thing that I’m doing that I haven’t done in a while is eat regular whole wheat bread, instead of the weight watchers bread. I don’t eat a lot of it but it could be the carbs. I did buy the WW wraps last night and they are so good with PB spread on them and rolled up..I really have to get some ww bread though.

I also need to start taking in more water. I don’t drink half as much as what I used to..although I still drink quite a bit a day.

Once bf goes away to Alberta again…perhaps early October, I can begin to get myself on track again. It’s so hard cooking and eating meals for the both of us. He doesn’t mind eating salads and chicken at all but I feel bad making him eat it ALL the time…lol..he is afterall a guy.

Alrighty i’m off to bed….work at 8 am.

Angela

God I love that song!!! (We always do it in our Zumba warm up..along with a little Pitbull)..that music puts me in a good mood.

Yesterday’s outdoor 2 hr Zumba party at my gym was cancelled..due to weather…..um..weather was fine..rained later in the evening..I honestly think its coz there were two back to back Zumba parties goin on this weekend..and the instructors were helpin each other out. So instead I went to yesterday’s aqua aerobics class and today’s two hour Zumba fundraiser for Breast Cancer. There were a LOT of people there and everyone had such a good time. I danced for the ENTIRE two hours..didn’t even take a pee break..lol. My knee started to bother me towards the end of it..not sure what’s going on with that.

My weight this AM was still 147…I’m not sure if its coz A) I ‘ve just slacked off on being so strict with the eating or B) more muscles from that vibration machine at the gym..a few weeks ago before I started doing it I was back down to 144-145. I’d honestly love to be back to 142. I know its only a few lbs but I can feel it.

Speaking of muscles and getting toned..I had my 4th treatment from my massage therapist Friday night ( what a way to start the weekend ) and I asked if she had seen any improvement in my back. She said that it seems much more toned. I think I can thank the vibration machine for that…there’s one move where I sit facing away from the machine..arms on the pad of it and I hold myself up off the floor. 

Off to watch a movie w/ my bf..he’s still not gone…and drink my green tea :-).

Have a wonderful week sister chicks!

Angela

** Michelle, Zumba is AWESOME..especially if you love dancing like I do..lol. It’s so much fun that its not even like a workout. Hope you’re feeling better soon!!!

Oh its such a nice day here…Mr. Sun is shining and its a beautiful Fall day…might as well say Summer is done and over with..lol.

Proud to say that I got up at 8..and went to a 9AM Zumba class at my gym. Next weekend there’s a 2 hr Zumba thingy going on at my gym…outdoors in the parking lot….trying to promote it I guess! And on Sunday there’s another 2 Hr Zumba party taking place at a community centre ( by my instructors)….It costs $10 and all funds go to Breast Cancer research!! I don’t think i’ll do both the two hour Zumba parties…hmmm…..

Bf got an email for a job away in Alberta the other night. They gave him two dates….either the 15th or 29th of Sept to start work again. The company will NOT be paying his airfare to/from Newfoundland and Alberta this time….which means he’ll be gone for a few mths. :-(. He used to work 21 days on and 7 off. This time its 10 days on and 4 off ( he’ll stay with his parents while he’s away).  He may be home for Xmas..maybe not. I will find it quite lonely around here I think……..My sister is NEVER home anymore…..always at her bf’s…she is off work on stress leave and cannot make up her mind about staying in here or moving home with mom for a while…3.5 hrs away…..oh dearrrrrrrrrrrr…

Have a great day! I THINK i’m going to a girls night tonight…just have some snacks and play games. I wasn’t gonna go if bf found out he had to leave in the next few days….but he hasn’t heard anything so i’m gonna go on out.

Hope you all have a lovely weekend!