Archive for March, 2012

Healthy living: living update

Thursday, March 29th, 2012

Hello world,

I’m sick. I appologized for the lack of blogging and update these days, but for some reason, I don’t feel like doing anything anymore. I guess I am kinda dissapointed about my grades.. and all. Yea, my mom told me not to be so sad about my grades, but I can’t help get depressed when it doesn’t turn out right.

As for my weight, it’s okay. It’s not going anywhere. I have more time to exercise now because I’m on spring break. But then my eating habit itsn’t very good. Since spring break, all my friends want to meet up and go “hang-out”. Thus, this lead to excessive eating, excessive sweet & fattening food. Worse off, I think I’m getting sick. SO, that mean no gym for me. Um.. yea

Well, I guess I’m kinda down, and lazy at the moment and that is b/c of 2 things:

1. My grades. I hope it’s not that bad :(

2. My crush.(Okay, i been hiding this from you all, but recently have i have a crush on this person. But they are in a relationship. That person also like me .. i think. BUt I told myself i’m not gonna go there. Because it’s bad. I don’t want to get involved in these kinda of ordeals because I know somewhere along the way, someone is going to get hurt. So, I took this on myself, I and walked out. Thus, I been down lately.. and maybe that was the reason for my lack of sleep & excessive eating of sweets & fat.)…. lol.. pathetic. I know.

But I guess, that sums it up. I haven’t been doing a photoshoot but I swear I will do one soon. It will be up before spring break is over. Now, I’m going to go weight myself and start over again. I need to clear my head and get over this girl. And I NEED to concentrate and focus on school.

I need to raise my grades! Argggh. I can’t let these kinda things get to me. ALso, I think I will need to do a day to day calories check in again because of my excessive eating lately.

Hope all is well for you! I’ll be browsing around your blog to gain inspiration again! :)

TECHNICAL PROBLEM: Can’t comment

Thursday, March 15th, 2012

I just noticed something today, But I can’t comment on anyone’s blog!?! I been looking around and I noticed that I’m not the only person who is getting it. I hope they fixed this soon!

Healthy Living: Love & Loss

Wednesday, March 14th, 2012

Dear 3fatchicks,

I don’t know why, but I always find myself back to here whenever I feel emotional. You been here for me to share my joy and my failure. It’s been nearly a year since I started on here, and let’s just say, we been through some crazy stuff together.

Today, I want to talk about something that is close to my heart. I recently developed a feeling toward someone in my school. I wasn’t interested in that person at first. I really didn’t. But after we started talking & texting, something really grow on me. I knew I shouldn’t think anything of it, but I guess, I fell for that person. But the thing is, that person already have a signficant other. I knew I was playing a losing game, and I should have walk away.. far away as possible. And I did just that, or at least I tried. And sometime, i feel like I have gotten ride of these feelings, but some day, it comes back to me.. and it hurts like hell.

I don’t know how I fell for this person. And, I really can’t tell that person. I pretend nothing is wrong, I keep quiet. I don’t let that person know how I feel. I guess, it’s because I didn’t want to disrupt their relationship with their significant others. I know I don’t have a chance with this person. Well, at least not in this circumstances.

There is nothing to do, except keep myself distracted. I have finals coming up, I will use to that keep me busy. But at some late night, I can’t help my mind wander. ANd the feeling comes back. But WAIT, before this post gets anymore depresssing, I’M going to end it here.

I’m not going to let this get to me. Sure, it hurts, but I been through more shit than this. I still got myself to work on. I still have dreams and goals to reach. I still need to get to 115! :) I still need to make my parents proud. I still need to get to med school one day. And I STILL need to develope my photography skill. AND. I have a great suppport system. :)  My family, my friends, and even the people on 3fatchicks. I feel very fortunate. I don’t know what I’m moping about! :) I must remain strong! :D

Digitial Update: 3/11/12

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

This photoshoot was taken last week. No photoshoot this week.

Healthy Living: OMG GOODNESS!!

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

Okay,

So, Finals are just a week away, and I’m getting scared and nervous.
I know I’m not suppose to stress out.. because stressing out will make me fat. Actually, in my bio class right now, I am learning the mechanics of the body metabolism and I can CLEARLY prove that stressing out induce a product of certain hormones that causes your body to store more fat than usual!! Yeah, so DOn’t stress! :)

In recent time, I have noticed that I’m getting skinner. But when I checked my weight, the scale doesn’t seem to be dropping. And, when i wear my jeans, I don’t feel any skinner. Thus, I finally conclude that I’m not getting skinner, but it is my hair that is growning longer. ANd since my hair is pretty long now, it does give off an an effect that make my face look smaller! I know, dissapointing. But talk about optical illusion! LOL :D haha

So, I’m suppose to be trying to exercise and eating healthy. But recently, I just got my period after 2 months?.. and so the exercise idea seems to go out of the window. In addition, when I’m on my period, I crave sweets and fatty food like no other. Not only that, I eat like crazy. I think I eat 2x the amount of food during this stage. So, There is probably not going to be any weight loss during this next week. I’ll be lucky if I can still be the same lbs by the end of all of this.

So, to avoid all of this, I’m carrying a box of mint everywhere I go. Studies have indicated that peppermint mint have some sort of effect on your appetite and tastebuds. FOr some reason, after eating 1 mint, you can reduce your tastebud craving by a little bit. THis doesn’t work if your starving, but if you are full and just want to stop your mouth from over eating, the mint works well! :) I have been use this tatics for a while now!

Also, I don’t feel like doing a photoshoot this week. It’s not going to happen with the schedule I have and the way I’m feeling at the moment. I feel dirty, stressed, and kinda.. craving for sweets! I want cake!! :D YAY!.. ..(yea, I”m not going to give in to that!)

Doesn’t the picture above with the cake just look soo good? ;)

Healthy Living: Hang In There-It’s only get better from here

Sunday, March 4th, 2012

So, Today, I was just sitting at home doing homework.. and procastinating.. as usual.

And, I was just thinking about my problems. I think about my relationship problem and the way I still struggle with myself and accepting who I am. And.. I just get all depressed and stuff. And then, I wish I didn’t have so much problems to worry about. I wonder how wonderful life would be without any problems. I wonder how crappy my life is right now.

And then, it hit me. My life isn’t crappy. And I don’t have that much problem. Sure, I have a few problems that drives me insane sometime, but everyone has problems. I’m not the only one struggling. And, then, I think about why I was sitting here and feeling all depressed in the first place. I don’t have to be unhappy. I do have control over my emotion. It’s such a waste of time to be unhappy.

I think that in this world, we all have problem. I think about 3fatchicks, and thought about all the bloggers on here. I’m sure you girls also have your own problems in life too and in the meantime, you also have to deal with your weight. And I realize, that there is a lot of stuff in this world that can mess with us..make us feel depressed. And sometime, in that depression, we lose sight of what is really important.

I don’t know, I’m not much of a writer. But I feel that I can make a difference in my life. I’m not perfect and nobody is. I have problems and bullshit I have to deal with on daily basis and I’m sure you have them too. But that is no reason to be sad or complain over. I think we can be the bigger person and deal with it, and make it better for ourself.

THus, I got up, and I decided I wanted to do something different today. Instead of shutting myself at home and procastinating, I will go out to lunch with people that I care about. I called up my baby cousin, and we went to eat thai food together. The meal was really fattening.. but we ate ourself silly. Just me and him. Haha, He ate so much that he could barely breathe. We didn’t talk much but I think we both had a really good time.

And.. that made my sunday! :) It really does. Today was worth living and there really is something worth celebrating for. Instead of being depressed, I choose to make my life better. I choose to have lunch with my baby cousin and that made me happy.

So, if you are reading my post now, and you are sad about your life. I just want to let you know that things does get better. You just have to hang in there during the hard time, and it will be better. However, good things don’t come by itself. You have to stand up and make it better for yourself. You have to be strong and be the stronger person.

This goes with everything we do. Whether we are suffering from our weight, our life goals, our relationship with other people.. or anything else. We have to make it better for ourself. And it start by doing something different.

For me today, it was loneliness. The feeling of inadequate.. the feeling of lost. I know, it’s weird. But that’s what I’m struggling over. And, by having lunch with my baby cousin, I feel happy. He cheered me up without even knowing it. And this “better” thing, didn’t happen because I continue to shut myself at home. NO, I go up and did something to improve the situation.

So, that’s what I learn. We gotta be proactive! :) THus, if you are frustrated and sad right now, you need to do something different to make yourself better. Things only get better only if YOU choose to make it better!!!

Here is a song that I feel really describe the moment:

[One Republic: Good Life] http://youtu.be/XckMvJYNZOc

Healthy Living: Back on Track

Saturday, March 3rd, 2012

So, I was emotionally disturbed these few days with relationship conflicts in my life.

I came out to my closet friend this week, and it turns out, she was really supportive. To my surprised, she even told me she went through a very similar situation. And, she even gave me advice on how to handle the situation. She told me to keep my head up high and don’t jump to conclusion. These kinds of things comes with time and experience. So, I stop worrying about it.

In the meantime, I took a more aggressive path on my weight. I was growing impatient and.. a little dishearten. I know, I’m not suppose to feel this way, but in recent time, I became very emotional. I blame it on hormones. I don’t know why, but I feel like I’m going through puberty again. And to be honest, my teenage puberty didn’t even make me feel this emotional.

So, I hit the gym on Friday and ran out my heart out. I climb the stairs for an hour while reciting the metabolism pathway for the citric cycle. The lady next to me thought I was crazy. Haha :) She didn’t really understand what I was saying because I was trying to rap my way to memmorzing all the name and step to the citric cycle. It was kinda funny. But by the end of the hour, my feet feels like it was going to fall off. But now, I can name all of the pathway to the citric cycle in my head! :)

THen, I hit the tredmill. This time, I couldn’t study anymore. I was just wanted to relax. But then again, my head start to wander again I started to think about my relationship problems again. SO, OUT OF Frustration, I speed up my tredmill and started jogging for 20 minutes straight. During that time, I wasn’t thinking about anything at all! Thank goodness! :) I keep myself on the tredmill and I ran until I couldn’t run anymore. I was very aggressive because I wanted to prove to myself that I can do this. I can overcome any challenges in my life, and every struggle will only bring closer to my goals and dream.

Yea…and in the meantime, I was breathing heavily. I think I turned purple. Hahaha! But it was okay, because after the run, I felt my body was burning up like crazy, but in the same time, I felt a sense of accomplishment. Not only have i ran for 20 minutes straight, I also stop my brain from wandering into unwanted thoughts.

Oh, I don’t have time to worry about these emotional stuff. My finals is coming soon and this is suppose to be my most difficult quarter yet. I can’t stop myself from getting distracted again. I need to focus. FInals is coming. Finals is coming. Finals is coming. My practical is up first. I need to focus and I need to get my priorty straight as well as my weight. I can’t let myself loose. I need to focus.